Relationships: Perks & Hurts

“You are not defined by a relationship.”

As a girl in college, there is so much that one needs to balance: school, work, fitness, being social, God, and BOYS. Oh, how boys have become such a priority on so many lists. Often times, they are at the top of one’s list, but is that where they’re supposed to be?

            Boys can be exciting and fun, but why does almost every college girl think of them as a necessity? From a girl who recently has been left heartbroken over a boy, I do not see the hype. However, I came out of this relationship knowing myself better than I did the year prior. Whether you’re in a relationship, single, or just getting out of one, I hope these are a few things you see in yourself; not the guy you are dating or wish you were dating.

1. Your identity lies in Him, not him.

             So many times we put ourselves into a relationship and become the relationship. We do everything with and for the other person, and that may be the start of an unhealthy one. A relationship should be two people growing together to benefit one another; not relying on each other for every decision (aka marriage). Do not become the other person in the relationship, they should not be your identity. One’s identity should lie in Christ. You should not feel doomed without the other person if it does not work out, because you have a something Greater to look to.

2. Your friends are some of the most important people in your life.

            Friends are important whether you are in a relationship or not, but they truly shine through a breakup. Do not let a relationship distract you from girl time, it is crucial. You friends should be high on your list of priorities because who is going to be there when you get your heartbroken? They are. Take the time to invest in friendships and to really get to know other people outside of your relationship. The best relationships are those that interact with others and can be in groups.

3.Do hobbies that you enjoy.

            Whether it is a sport, reading, blogging, etc. cut out time for you. Your needs are important, and should be a priority. Creating time for yourself will help you feel more confident and aware in who you are, and isn’t that the definition of beautiful?

4. If it’s meant to be, it will be.

            To the girl who is still hung up over that guy, or waiting for the perfect one... if it is meant to be it will be. I know many say it, but it is true. In the meantime, work on yourself! Be the confident woman you are meant to be, and God will send a guy in due time. Don’t rush something because good things happen to those who wait.

5. Change can be a blessing in disguise.

            Getting out of a relationship is hard no matter how long you guys were together, but sometimes it is the best thing for you. We go through these trials in life to get to the man God has for us. You are one step closer to your husband, and although it may not seem like that right now, this is going to make you a better wife. You will learn how you can better improve yourself and become the woman of God your future husband is waiting for.