Sometimes making a friend can feel like a complicated process. You want to meet new people but either don’t know how to go about, feel uncomfortable, or are shy. Sometimes you can even be a combination of all three. They all can feel as equally hard. Whether I’m walking to class, going to get lunch, or on my way to work, there’s always someone to say hi to. Which raises the question, how did I meet all these people? I’ll give you eight simple ways that you can try to meet new people and hopefully have some new friends.
1.Be Brave
First thing’s first, be brave! Put down those insecurities that you loathe so much and decide to be brave. Many people are afraid of meeting people because they fear what others will think. They shy away quickly, let regret quickly follow, and remorse of self-hatred dwells inwardly for way too long. Sound like you? I give you permission to let go of those feelings and choose bravery. In the long run you’ll love yourself more for it.
2.Smile
You would be surprised (or at least I am) at how few people smile when passing others on the street or on the way to class. For me, I tend to smile when I make eye contact. A friendly face will go far, especially when wanting to make friends. I find that when I smile at others it makes them smile back! Give it a shot.
3.Be the first to say, “Hi.”
So you smiled at someone–the next step is to say “Hi”. Mind blowing, I know, but it’s true. For all you know they may have wanted to say something to you or give you a compliment but maybe they have refrained. Being the one to say “Hi” first can give the other person “permission,” if you will, to say something back to you. Chances are they may want new friends, too, and you could end up becoming BFF’s! After you say “hi,” whatever they say to you will put the ball back in your court and give you an opportunity to keep the conversation going. Which could look something like this:
Smile and say “Hi”
“Hey”
“I really like your dress!”
“Thanks I got it at this little shop in Scottsdale. Do you know where Fashion Square is? It’s a few blocks from there.”
And from there, let nature take its course in conversation. This is also a great approach for class; the two (or few) of you will have a lot to talk about since you are in class together.
4.Invite them to an event
This doesn’t have to be just at school. However, there are always signs around campus for events going on. Invite someone! Ask them if they’re going, no matter how dumb the event may sound. Between the two of you, no one has to exchange information (unless desired) and all that needs to be done is show up. If they come, great! If not, you’re at an event where there should be plenty of people to meet. The best part of meeting more people is that before long, those friends will be friends of friends. Then those friends will know other friends of friends and the trend can go on and on. All the while you close gaps with mutuality because you said, “Hi” and went to Casino Night.
5.Join a Club
This should be a ton of fun because you don’t have to be an expert at something to join. Ask anyone– getting involved is quite possibly the number one way to make new friends. Clubs on campus are a great way to explore different hobbies you may enjoy. Get better at what you love while meeting others who enjoy the same hobbies! You don’t have to pick just one; you could attend several meetings of all types of clubs. Find what fits you!
6.A Job on Campus
Maybe you commute to campus but can’t make it to the events at night. Consider getting a job on campus. They may not be glorious jobs, but schools like to hire within their student body. Then you would get a chance to bond with co-workers who are also your classmates. They may even be taking some of the same classes so your coworker could become a new study buddy.
7.Don’t Give Up
Although things may sound promising at first, you may find out after a few awkward conversations that you aren’t clicking with someone. You weren’t just in the beginning stages of getting to know someone; there was just no friend connection, nothing in common like you had hoped. Don’t let that stop you. Time will tell, and you’ll figure out if they’re the type of person you want to call when it’s time to Netflix binge.
8.Know the Balance
If you meet a cute guy and he starts texting you, and Snap-Chatting you 24/7, you get pretty annoyed, right? Sure he was promising but now… forget it. He’s too needy right? Let’s not forget it’s the same way when you want to make a friend. Know the balance and let the crazy come a little later when you guys are comfortable enough to be your goofy selves around each other.
Most importantly, remember that real friends are far and few between. Using these eight steps to meet people is great, but finding long lasting friends takes time. Although I may know a good amount of people on campus, my true friends I can count on one hand.