What Your Finals Week Attire Says About You

Finals week is hard enough as it is. How can anyone honestly expect you to dress somewhat decent when you’ve been up for 30 hours and can’t even see straight? There’s no need to care about fashion during this annual week we all dread because, and High School Musical said it best, “We’re all in this together.” Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not here to take part in you trying to get your professor to round your 69 to an A; however, I am here for all of your fashion struggles that I know we can all relate to. But everyone has a go-to outfit for their finals week and I’m here to tell you what your college fashion statement says about you. So put on those sweatpants for #FinalsFashionWeek.

First up, the Basic B. We all know one and we’ve all been one, it’s inevitable. If you’re wearing yoga pants, a fuzzy fleece, a cozy headband to protect your ears from 60-degree hypothermia and a pair of Uggs to tie it all together, there’s a 101% chance that you caught a classic case of the Basic B. No shame in it whatsoever because I think we can all agree that it’s one of the cozier and more fashionable options. You’re likely to show up to your final a few minutes late with Chick-fil-A in hand and a distressed look on your face. It’s not likely that you’re ready for your final, even though you spent a whole 2 hours studying beforehand, but it is likely that your bloodstream is 80% nonfat peppermint mocha latte with the other 20% being the will to pull a C+ out of thin air. Good luck honey, the Chick-fil-A was probably worth it! And don’t worry, a bad GPA isn’t forever.

The second attire is sweatpants and a sweatshirt and there’s nothing cute about either of these clothing options. It’s clear to everyone that you have simply given up. You are likely a senior trying to just graduate and pass Finance with a C. Either that or you’re a struggling STEM major. You’ve been up for a solid 3 days straight and you’re just counting down the hours until you can lay down in your own bed, praying you don’t pass out before you make it home. You’ve resorted to black coffee and Monster because at this point it’s all about survival, you can worry about useless things like heart rates and death later. There’s a chance you haven’t showered in a few days and you’ve adopted the scent of Strozier library. Thankfully you’ve been here before and you know to bring a toothbrush to the library. Don’t worry, I’m sure your grade won’t be as bad as this fashion disaster. But hey, as long as you’re comfy and you pass, who cares.

Next up is the college student who shows up to their final in a tank top and shorts. They may be wearing fuzzy socks just for comfort. They’ll wear this attire whether its 80 or 40 degrees outside being that they have, like most of us, given up. They prefer this attire in the cold weather hoping that perhaps they can catch Pneumonia and opt out of their final that they totally didn’t study for. It’s likely that they woke up late, slept through their alarm and just barely made it to their final. Instead of Pneumonia, they’re stuck with the common cold and a B+. Not too bad if you ask me.

This next fashion piece is a common theme among out-of-state students. They’ll show up to their final ready to take it and get the eff out of there, not staying past Wednesday if they can help it. They’ll show up in comfy clothes, likely PJs and even a neck pillow attached. Chances are, they have a flight to catch immediately after their final. You hear a horn honk outside, it’s probably their Uber waiting to drive them to the airport. They’ll take their final in record-breaking time and head out the classroom door with a carry-on in hand. They may be quick, but it’s likely they were prepared for this test since the day that they booked their flight.

Moving onto the next attire, we are talking all black baby, head-to-toe. This is one of my personal favorites as it simply sets the mood for the entire week of finals. Finals week is the week where you’re allowed to be as emo as you want and listen to “Mr. Brightside” as loud as you can. There are so many reasons for wearing all black: no one knows how clean your clothes may or may not be, you can spill a whole pitcher of coffee on you and no one will notice, and no one can see how much your profusely sweating for the final you’re about to fail. The main reason for all black, however, is that the student is likely preparing for the funeral of their GPA. Rest in Peace you sweet, sweet 3.0. You were too young, and I’m so sorry we took you for granted. Maybe we’ll see you in the Spring.

The last, yet most rare, outfit you may see during this dreadful week is an individual who looks like they have their life together. We’re talking denim jeans, a nice tucked in shirt, and I’m sorry, is that a belt?! They look like they stepped off the cover of a fashionable college textbook ready to turn their 3.89 GPA into a 3.90. Pray for the teacher who dares to give them an A-. This individual has been studying since they came out of the womb, and don’t try to mention Ariana Grande or the Kardashians because they probably won’t have a single clue as to what you are talking about. They have more pressing issues like their fight to end world hunger. And if their GPA somehow drops to a 3.88, thank goodness they’ve had a job offer waiting since freshman year. Their friends likely refer to them as Mrs. or Mr. President and rightfully so. Tighten that ponytail hun, you’re our future.

No matter which of these attires you may wear, if any, I wish you good luck on your finals. Keep your eyes peeled for #FinalsFashionWeek for some of the best people-watching you’ll ever get the chance to do. And just know, sometimes success comes packaged in three-year-old sweatpants. You got this.