Before college, I had grown up arguing with my two brothers over leaving dirty clothes in our bathroom, complaining over never having rights to the TV remote, and feeling the constant need to retreat to my room to escape the chaos of living in a male-dominated household. When I completed my housing contract for FSU, I didn’t realize that I’d be living with only girls for the first time. I’d always been one to keep to myself in living spaces, desperately needing my alone time to function properly. But once I moved into the dorms that habit did a full 180, and surprisingly enough, for the better.
We’ve all heard horror stories of what can happen when four or more girls are sharing the same living space, but fortunately for me, I haven’t been able to relate. My experience living in such a small dorm with three roommates has been a chaotic but formative one.
Coming from a house with my dad and two older brothers, my mom and I have always been the minority. When I started living with only girls, I couldn’t believe what I had been missing out on.
One thing that I wasn’t used to was how open girls are with each other. Being vulnerable with other people was something I used to struggle with, but when I started living with women and watching them easily wear their hearts on their sleeves, I started to feel more comfortable doing the same.
Something that shocked me about living with girls was how caring I’d become. Anytime I was sick, somebody offered to bring me soup or a dining hall cookie. It was a casual gesture, but it always made me smile knowing that someone was looking out for me. Because of this, I started to feel an oddly maternal care for the girls I’ve lived with.
In a mostly male household, I was used to toughing out situations that bothered me. However, when any of my roommates displayed even an ounce of frustration, I was ready to sit and listen to as many renditions and hypotheses of a situation they could come up with. If they needed a hug, an Insomnia cookie, or a pillow to scream into, I was prepared for anything.
Having someone to rely on, whether it’s to complain about how many assignments I have due that day or discuss the timelessness of “CTRL” by SZA, really helps me function like a sane member of society. I’m a big fan of journaling, but having someone usually no more than six feet away from me to talk to is so much better.
There are some things that girls just get, and it’s always interesting to see how differently we live our lives yet still be able to bond over the female experience. Any time I need advice on college, beauty, love, friendship, fashion, and quite literally anything else, I’m asking my roommates first.
If living with girls has taught me one thing, it’s that female friendships can be so fulfilling. Like I said before, I used to seriously value my alone time. My grandpa once bought me a shirt that said “My alone time is for everyone’s safety,” and I wore it proudly. I can wholeheartedly say that’s not the case anymore. If anything, the time I spend debriefing and giggling with my roommates is more healing than relaxing in bed by myself. The second I hear somebody laugh in the other room, in less than a millisecond I’m out of bed and a part of the commotion.
Yes, maybe there is hair literally everywhere and 10 too many beauty products in our already tiny shower, but I wouldn’t trade my experience living with women for the world. Having women to rely on for honesty, advice, comfort, and comedy has absolutely deepened my appreciation for life.
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