Sharing your space can be complicated and even stressful at times. After all, starting to live on your own away from home is already hard enough as it is. Even the most famous TV roommates Rachel and Monica from Friends had their rough patches. If you want to avoid any awkward moments and want to have a good relationship with your roommate, you have to be assertive about what you want, but also be willing to give in sometimes for the sake of fairness.
Do: Talk to your roommate
You should get to know your roommate as soon as you move into a new place. This will make your relationship less awkward and your time together more meaningful. If you are already friends with your roommate, or you know them from before, then try to deepen the relationship by learning important stuff about them such as their allergies to food or their pet-peeves. If something that they do bothers you, talk to them! Chances are they will try to accommodate you if you are willing to do the same for them.
*Pro Tip: Propose to have a “roommate night” once a week or just have dinner once a week together to talk about everything that’s on your minds and to bond a little more.
Don’t: Dismiss your roommate’s requests
If your roommate expresses that something you do bothers her, do not dismiss her and forget everything she said, this would just create more conflict in the future. Instead, try to negotiate and meet in the middle if it is something you can’t or don’t want to stop doing.
Do: Keep your valuables secured
We all want to feel safe within our own rooms, so make sure that your personal space is always secured. Even if you trust your roommate, she might invite over some guests that you are not familiar with. It is better to prevent any incidents from happening in the first place by keeping your valuables in a secure place that won’t be at the sight or reach of anyone else but yourself. Locking your room before leaving is a great way to give you peace of mind while you are away.
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Don’t: Overcrowd the room
Just like you have your personal space, your roommate also has hers, but the space you both share is for you both to enjoy. Don’t have big parties or get-togethers in the common area without checking in if it’s okay with them first. They will know not to do that to you either in case you are bothered by the noise or the limited space.
Do: Share with each other
Sharing is caring. If you can live together, then you can certainly share a few things with your roommate. It goes a long way when you try to help each other and make each other’s life easier by simply offering to share something as simple as a can opener, plates, or even some of your food or snacks on certain occasions. Just be sure to state clearly if you allow them to borrow your things always or if you’d like for them to ask for your permission first each time.
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Don’t: Abuse of your roommate’s kindness
If your roommate is not being communicative enough, but you still notice something is annoying them, ask them and get the doubt out of the way to avoid future conflicts. They might not want to bother you by telling you that they are not comfortable. Same thing goes for things that you might borrow from them; don’t overuse their things to avoid being called out on it or being liable if something breaks or stops working.
Do: Clean after yourself
No one likes to come home to a mess, especially if someone else made the mess. It’s always better to clean after yourself when you cook, shower or hang out in the common area to avoid having an awkward conversation about cleaning up the room.