1. Your friends ask you for advice despite the fact that your last relationship was over 2 years ago.
“So Billy has been acting really strange lately. What do you think it could be? Should I ask his roommates what’s going on with him?”
2. But even though you probably have zero idea of what you are talking about you manage the best piece of advice you’ve ever heard.
3. You have to pick out presents when sadly you aren’t getting your own, or any of the credit for that matter
“Do you think Billy would like this watch for our one month anniversary? Can you come to the mall with me and help me pick out which one I should get?”
4. When you plan to have a girls’ night, your friend decides to invite their boyfriend.
“Is it okay if Billy comes over he hasn’t seen Dear John yet and I really want him to watch it!”
5. You go to discuss last night’s events at the bar with your friend, but SURPRISE! her boyfriend is still in her bed
6. You and your friend are mid conversation when he decides to start being affectionate.
*making out*
No it’s fine I’ll finish my story later…
7. When your friend in a long distance relationship complains that she hasn’t had sex in more than two weeks while your love life is more inconsistent than the weather outside.
8. Your friend goes into full detail about the amazing date she had with her boyfriend while you’re trying to remember the last time you actually had a date.
Well that guy took me to get pizza like three months ago and he paid so that’s a date…right?
9. When your friends discuss how so-and-so has a new boyfriend and then say things like “I just don’t understand how they have a boyfriend and you don’t”
LOL me either…
10. Going through the list of guys you’ve hooked up with since freshman year is the worst form of torture.
“Well before Billy and I met I had only hooked up with three people. How many people have you hooked up with Lexi?”
*attempts counting on all fingers and toes*
11. You can’t understand the arguments they have…how could two people argue over the dumbest things you’ve ever heard?
12. You keep your opinions about your friends’ boyfriends to yourself otherwise you aren’t being supportive.
“You like Billy right? Isn’t he like the sweetest, best looking, funniest guy ever?”
*sits back and says nothing*
13. The only way to spend time with your friend is to become best friends with their boyfriend because third wheeling is your best option.
14. When one of your friends breaks up with their boyfriend you feel really, really terrible (you promise you do!) but you’re also sort of excited to finally have another single friend
15. Your friend tries to set you up with her boyfriend’s only single friend so that way you guys can double date and have matching relationships.
“Wouldn’t it be great if you dated Billy’s friend Zach? You guys would be perfect together! Then we’d both be dating guys in their house! How perfect!”
…nothing against Zach but you’ve a) never spoken before and he’s b) not even your type
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