Hello all! Today I will be talking about how I have made my relationship last long-distance for over two years and survived in general for five years. I do not believe for one second that the way me and my boyfriend are doing long-distance is perfect, in fact, it is far from perfect. Nor is there any way to do long-distance perfectly… it is long-distance after all! However, for any of your first years or third years where you or your partner or both are on a year abroad here are some of my top tips for maintaining a healthy relationship when you cannot be together in person.
1. Facetime
Facetime, Skype, Zoom, Teams, or any other alternative will be your lord and saviour. Without Facetime, my relationship would not exist. Facetime is probably the main institution of my boyfriend and I’s relationship. We call in the day, evening, morning. Whenever we get free time, we are on Facetime. Speaking on the phone is nice but nothing beats seeing your partner’s face when you speak. In addition, you can spend hours on it without the risk of being charged any money. I believe this is the best means of conversation also because it is the most similar to speaking in person.
2. Small and random acts of kindness
This is something that requires thought and some planning. As I am writing this tomorrow is my 5th anniversary with my boyfriend and I have decided to surprise him with an Uber Eats gift card as we cannot go and celebrate for dinner but at least he does not have to cook. Small gifts like flowers or sending a note in the post is a cute idea just to show that you care about them. My boyfriend is an expert in surprising me with soft toys.
3. Having something to look forward to
Having an event or a time when you will speak next or see each other next is important. This provides hope and excitement to your relationship. I believe that without having something to look forward to with your significant other makes it difficult to always remain positive about your future. Unfortunately for me, I will not see my partner until I travel home for Christmas now but as I come home in early December we are planning things we will do and I plan to visit him at his university before he comes home.
4. Planning visits in advance
Always having a visiting date or time you will see each other next is very important. I think without a date in the books it can make the relationship feel like less of a priority or not very important to both parties involved. It shows that you care to keep things planned. Similar to what I said in my last point also it gives you something to get excited about and look forward to.
5. Trust
Trust is something which can be hard when you are not always with your partner, and we all have the same fears but without it will eventually kill your relationship. Trusting your partner becomes easier once you gain a routine with calls and messages, I also believe that soon into doing long-distance you will know whether your partner is committed or not. I luckily find trusting my partner easy because he is an angel, but I have my jealous moments also. However, you must have high levels of trust to feel safe in your distance.
I hope some of these tips have helped you or will help you in your long-distance relationships. It is hard and challenging but stay strong because if you stick with it your relationship will grow and become so much stronger. Having a long-distance relationship is also a blessing in some ways as it truly tests your compatibility, commitment, and trust in each other and when you do see each other again you will cherish those moments so much more.