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Kelly Marcelo-Summer Field Happy Girl
Kelly Marcelo-Summer Field Happy Girl
Kelly Marcelo / Her Campus
Wellness > Sex + Relationships

Embracing single life in your 20’s

The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Exeter chapter.

Whether you’ve been single for a week, a month, a year, or many more, sometimes being single can feel lonely and challenging, but I promise, it doesn’t have to.

 Here are 6 tips to help you embrace being single as a 20-something.

Focus on your self-love and healing journey. 

Everyone has their issues, even those who try not to acknowledge them. Use this time to start healing and loving yourself. You could begin with affirmation meditation and do some internal reflection; keep a journal of things that pop up as you start looking within. Focus on healing those parts of yourself that have been damaged. When starting meditation, it’s good to begin with small amounts of time, otherwise it can be quite overwhelming. For the first week, try and just fit in 5 – 10 minutes daily and gradually increase. Also, you could use a guided meditation app which helps you ease into this new experience. I personally also like to set the atmosphere. Try surrounding yourself with healing crystals and sit in a dark room with candles creating light and mood – it helps you mentally prepare.

Girly Dates

Have you noticed that whenever you start dating someone, you see your friends a little bit less – it’s completely normal! There is now something new taking up a lot of your free time. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying ignoring your friend when you’re in a relationship is okay but going from seeing them five times a week before to around twice a week can be expected. Being single in your 20s is the perfect time to really focus on your friendships. Plan nights out, weekend trips or even just some weekday dinner dates. Spend time with the girls who support you, encourage you and push you to be the best version of yourself.

Start a new hobby

Do something purely because you want to do it. It could be anything. Maybe you’ve always wanted to try windsurfing, camping, knitting, wild swimming or boxing. Anything that you think will make you happy. This is the perfect time to learn and develop a new skill and expand on who you are. Another really cool thing to do once you’ve found a new hobby is if you go to classes or look online, you will meet like-minded people who love your hobby as much as you do and make some new friends.

Set yourself a challenge

Is there something you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t had time to do? Now is your chance. You’ll find you have more free time as a single person, so set yourself a challenge. You might want to cook every recipe from that recipe book you were gifted 2 years ago, or it might be something more active like signing up for a half or – dare I say – FULL marathon?! Whatever it is, do it because you want to do it. Challenge yourself and have something to work towards. Setting a deadline will help with working towards your goal and when you’re feeling unmotivated, just think about that amazing feeling of accomplishment you’ll have once it’s done.

Date yourself

Now, this has been said time and time again, but if you want to enjoy spending time on your own, you need to do fun things with yourself… (did that sound dirty to you, or was it just me?) What I mean is, take yourself for a coffee date. Go sit in the park with a book and a little picnic, or you could go paint some ceramics, maybe go and watch some live music. Do whatever it is that you enjoy, but please make sure you do your hair and make up, and choose an outfit you love – you need to make the same effort you would for an actual date – give yourself the same respect and care you would for a guy you met on tinder… the better you feel, the better your self-date will be. The more you focus on yourself and date yourself; the more you’ll start to love the freedom being single brings you.

Let’s get naughty…

Do you really know what you like? Like, really, though? Now is the time you get to experiment sexually. Next week why not plan out different ways of pleasuring yourself each night? I mean really experiment with your sexuality. You could watch some porn and experiment with sex toys, tingly lube and masturbation techniques (look online – I promise you’ll learn a thing or two!). The best thing about being single is that you only need to focus on pleasing yourself – you can be totally selfish. Our partners often teach us about the things we like or don’t like and introduce us to new things, so now, while you’re single, why not do your own research and find the best way to please yourself?

In conclusion

Being single is a great time to work on yourself, learn about yourself and learn to love yourself. Embrace this special time that you get to hang out with your friends and do your favourite things – it’s a time virtually free of compromise, and I feel like singleness is very undervalued.

I am an English Literature student at the University of Exeter studying English Literary Studies. I'm interested in empowering woman to be the best versions of themselves and speaking about mental health and offering advice and support to others.