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5 Problems We Have With The Notebook

With summer on the horizon, a lot of us are praying for a cute holiday romance filled with beach trips, secret meet-ups and jumping-into-their-arms-kissing. Of course the chances of us actually having a holiday of Sun, Sex and Snogging are not particularly high. With this in mind, many of us turn to the next best thing: watching The Notebook.

But here at HCX we have decided that enough is enough. Noah’s relationship with Aly is, in fact, far from ideal. We shouldn’t be swooning over the chemistry between Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams, but should instead think about the couple’s big flaws that no-one really talks about…

1. Noah is a manipulative creep.

When Noah asks Aly to dance she says ‘no’ because ‘I don’t want to’. Now, any normal guy would accept this rejection and move on. But not Noah. He instead climbs on top of a Ferris wheel and threatens to kill himself if Aly won’t go out with him. Whilst some see this gesture as wildly romantic, it’s actually manipulative and just not acceptable.

2. The relationship is super intense.

Noah and Aly spend every minute of every day together. That’s not a healthy relationship. Why isn’t Aly spending any time with her parents? Aren’t Noah’s friends a bit miffed that he now comes as a packaged deal with Aly? It’s all just a bit too claustrophobic and, when they are separated, you see that they literally don’t function without each other.

3. They don’t have much in common.

They fight all of the time, and resolve their fights by kissing. That’s not a great basis for a lifelong relationship. We don’t even get a sense that they have much to talk about when they are together – they hardly know each other, really! It’s like they’re in love with the idea of their relationship – not really with each other.

4. They hurt people around them.

Of course it’s terrible that Aly cheats on her lovely, supportive fiancé. But that’s not the worst part: Noah uses Martha Shaw in a much more cruel way. Martha is the woman that Noah sleeps with to try to get over Aly. That in itself is cruel, and he doesn’t treat her right. He should be taking her out for dinner, giving her compliments, trying to be a decent partner… But instead, he looks through her and that can’t be great for Martha’s self-esteem.

5. Noah just can’t move on…and that’s not healthy.

When Aly leaves, Noah writes her 365 letters. 365. How would he even find enough to write about for that long to a girl he barely knows?! When he doesn’t hear from Aly, Noah spirals into depression and cannot move on with his life. Again, this is not healthy. You should not aspire to be in a relationship where you physically can’t cope without the other person.

Whilst the kissing in the rain scene does look fun, it’s clear that Noah and Aly’s relationship is not that great. So don’t feel too gutted when your cheeky kiss with Paolo by the pool doesn’t turn into an all-consuming love affair. It’s more fun to keep the romance light and breezy, and leave them behind as you get on that plane heading for Heathrow.


I am the new President of Her Campus Exeter. Last year I was a very enthusiastic Sex & Relationships editor, and I hope to be a magazine journalist. I'm slightly addicted to Diet Coke, and running to the fridge is my idea of exercise.
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