Dear RLEG,
I am now in a sorority but my boyfriend is a GDI. I’m nervous that my participation in Greek life is going to come between us, or that he won’t understand the commitment I’ve made to my sorority. Any advice? How do I balance my relationship with Greek life, academics, and everything else I’ve got going on?
Sincerely,
The Newly-Greek Goddess
Dear Newly Greek Goddess,
Unfortunately, your concern with this situation is all too common, and understandably so. I think I have a few tips that might be able to settle your nerves a little.
First of all, congrats on getting into a sorority! This is an exciting and awesome way to make new, lifelong friends and connections and opens doors that you may have never even known existed. Your boyfriend, be he a GDI or in a top fraternity (don’t get me started on Emory’s “tier” system…) should have this attitude about the situation.
Tip #1: if he truly cares for you and is invested in your best interests, he should be as excited for you as you are for yourself.
Tip #2: talk to him! See how he feels! A lot of guys are a bit nervous about their girlfriends going and partying with other guys, especially when alcohol is involved. If he’s the jealous type (I know I am) then it is definitely going to take some getting used to. But trust is the most important part of any relationship and if he truly trusts you (and you don’t break that trust) then he will warm up to it in time.
Tip #3: let him get to know some of your new sisters. If he knows he can trust you, the next step is to trust your
new closest friends. A big fear of boyfriends (especially jealous ones) is that your new “friends” might be the ones pressuring you to do something you might not normally do that could potentially hurt him. The more he knows, likes and trusts your friends the more comfortable he’ll get with the situation.
tip #4:focus on you a little bit. Chances are if you just got into a sorority you’re a freshman or sophomore. Take this chance to really reflect on how healthy your relationship, your academic lifestyle and social lifestyle are in your life. College is about getting ahead in life and things like a boyfriend, a sorority or even clubs are things that are supposed to add to that experience. If any of those are making you miserable or making you regret anything, maybe you should rethink your decision on that aspect!
I hope my tips were a little helpful! Don’t forget, Valentines Day is coming up… nothing says “I Love You” like a little present for both of you from Victoria’s Secret!
Best,
RLEG