“You’re just… not like other girls.”
It’s not the first time some guy, trying desperately to get in my pants, has said this to me. I’m not the only one who hears this “pick-up line” either. My friends get it all the time. All of us have our own stories about a time when a horny boy has tried to boost our egos by telling us we are superior than the other girls he’s been with.
It’s supposed to make us feel special. Unique. Different. How lucky am I? This boy doesn’t think of me as “just another girl!” I’m special! I wear glasses and read books! No other girl can do that apparently.
Boys, stop giving us this “compliment.” What’s so wrong with “other girls?” Why shouldn’t I want to be like them? Why are we subjecting girls to a specific “type,” and pitting these types against one another? Clearly, if so many girls are, as we’ve been told, “not like others,” we’ve got enough individuality in ourselves to claim uniqueness. We know this.
Here’s something surprising: girls are allowed to have common grounds with others in terms of interests and trends, while still maintaining their own sense of distinctiveness and personality! Crazy, right?
“You’re just… not like other girls,” He said.
“How so?” I challenged.
“You know, you’re better—you act differently, you—”
So are you telling me that you expected all girls to behave in the same way? It surprises you that we have originality? You’re commending me on my ability to be my own person? Gee, thanks.
I don’t mean to sound bitter. However, I’ve come to realize this “compliment” isn’t made to appreciate my differences. It’s intent is to congratulate myself for behaving in a way acceptable to his eyes; for “sticking out” in a way he prefers. This isn’t a compliment. It’s an F.Y.I that I’m keeping this boy interested, as if that’s my job.
Ladies, next time we’re informed that we are “not like other girls,” I propose we follow up with a question regarding what these infamous other girls are like. Chances are, you’ll get a rich misogynistic answer.
At the end of the day, it’s important to remind ourselves that having similarities is what keeps us connected. Let’s not let someone take away our shared interests. Let’s not allow ourselves to be pinned against one another. Common ground keeps us united, and we know how important unity is amongst women.