It’s 11:00 pm. You just finished watching your usual round of prime time TV, when the anchor on the newscast says something that makes a spark go off in your head. Suddenly you remember that 8-page midterm paper you’ve been procrastinating since what seems like the dawn of time is finally due tomorrow. As you stare at the blinking cursor on the blank Word document, you realize that you’re going to be up all night. The art of the all-nighter is one I haven’t perfected, but know well enough to pull one. These time-marked tips, tricks and traumas are a result of my personal sleepless experiences:
Midnight: Panic/Zero Panic mode. This is when you realize that there are only 9 hours standing between you and the time you have to turn in your paper, which could be a bit jarring. But in this same hour, those 9 hours seem a lot more expansive, and you might find yourself saying, “I’ve got plenty of time.” But you have to remember that your body is not going to like being active all night, so this is when you have to prepare. Stock up at the C-store, pick your caffeine poison (though for the least toxic option, I’d suggest some caffeinated tea), and make sure you have a lot of sugars. Natural sugars like those found in fruits would be best, but considering we don’t always have easy access to the fresh produce aisle at the grocery store, sometimes you’ll have to resort to a sugary snack. My personal pick is Greek yogurt with fruit; if all else fails, don’t be afraid to take the plunge and just have a pinch of pure sugar as needed. Regardless, make sure you keep a protein-heavy snack on deck, like granola bars.
3 am: Attack of the Short Attention Span. After being on top of your game for three hours (including added sidetrack time, more like two hours) and halfway through your paper, suddenly all the sugar and caffeine in your system start to catch up with you and it’s bad news for your productivity. Suddenly you start to notice that mark on your wall that never seemed as important to tackle as it does at this moment; or perhaps you decide your common room needs redecorating, and it simply can’t wait; maybe you just want to Facebook stalk. This is the time of the night when other actions seems appealing that don’t involve sitting at a computer and typing the rest of this paper. After all, you only have 4 more pages to go, that’s 2 pages single-spaced, so no big deal. Even math starts to sound appealing. It wouldn’t hurt to reorganize your snack stash or attempt that pilates move you’ve been dying to try out. But seriously, it wouldn’t. Getting your fanny off your seat and up from under the shackles of your laptop can actually help re-stimulate your body and mind, giving you the boost you need to eventually get back to the paper.
6 am: The (Extensive) Home Stretch. …emphasis on eventually. Three more hours have passed and you’re struggling, to say the least. The magic of the sugar and caffeine came and went at this point, and you’re starting to borderline on delusional; hence the reason the eigth page of this paper has nothing on it but one incomprehensible sentence that was clearly birthed from a sleep-deprived mind. Your bed has never looked more inviting…actually any surface you could lay on has never looked more inviting. Your eyelids are in a fight to the death with gravity and you start to wonder if taking a quick power nap might be all you need to finish the paper. But that’s the last thing you need at this point; that power nap could easily turn into an endless slumber. This is when you need a quick recharge to your battery, just enough juice so you can finish the job. Try whipping out that granola bar you bought earlier, then work all the mental motivation muscles you can to finish off that last paragraph or two.
8 am: Crash & Burn. You’ve finally finished and printed your paper, a labor of love and lack of sleep. Now it’s time for you to catch up on those z’s. Don’t be afraid to hit that pillow hard. You deserve it!