If you’ve read the title of this article, the chances are you’re expecting some bitter, cynical rant about why Valentine’s Day just isn’t ok (probably by a single girl in denial). Surprisingly though, I am in fact in a relationship; a relationship I consider healthy and stable. This, however, has failed to turn me into some puppy dog-eyed, love- struck, St. Valentine obsessed zombie. Sure, Valentines Day can be…cute (there, I said it) but there is a lot wrong with it, too.
1)It’s too commercial
Valentine’s Day is ultimately another excuse for people to make money. Forget being blinded by love, all the big companies can see is money, money and more money. A happy and balanced relationship shouldn’t be based on materialism. Sure, its nice for you to treat one another once in a while, but not because society has told you to. Valentine’s Day strips the giving of a gift of its spontaneity and sincerity. The big shots don’t care if you’re happy; they just want you to splash your cash on their range of generic cards, chocolates and jewelry to prove that you are happy, which leads me to my next point…
2) It pressurises you into ‘proving’ yourself
If you go all out for Valentines Day, you’re happy, right? If you go out for a meal, watch a film, buy and receive gifts, get flowers delivered and post a completely not staged Instagram pic with hashtags galore, you’re ultimate relationship goals, yes? No! Valentines day is not about anyone else; it’s about you and your significant other. Going way over the top does not mean your relationship is perfect; it’s not a competition. The little, thoughtful things count and will mean more than anything too extravagant planned just to one up the smug couple from your seminar.
3) It advertises a false convention
Omg everyone’s in a relationship, I should be in a relationship, right? I need a relationship! What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I find anyone? (Cue a desire to watch Bridget Jones and cry into a bag of popcorn). If you’re single on Valentines Day, this awful thought process has the ability to consume you. I can certainly relate! But stop it, please! You don’t NEED a relationship, nor do you ever have to have one. Being in a relationship is a nice idea, but it’s not a necessity. Relationships shouldn’t exist for the sake of it, so embrace being single and live your life. If someone walks into your life and it happens to work out, great. You can enjoy a bit of Bridget either way.
4) It makes people sad
40% of the population associates Valentines Day with negative emotions, with 1 in 10 people feeling lonely and insecure. And this isn’t even restricted to singletons! Even people in a relationship aren’t happy! What is the point?? You just can’t win.
5) You can’t escape it
It’s everywhere! And I mean everywhere! Sure, we expect it in the card shops and jewelry stores, but now its infiltrated ASOS’s new in section, your twitter feed, your daily urban outfitters email, and now has even invaded Her Campus! (Sorry about that…) It quite literally takes over the world; and you’re just expected to accept it.
6) It’s sexist
The man is expected to deliver. He has to take control; buy extravagant presents and plan a romantic date. The woman has to look pretty and go along with it. Talk about conforming to gender stereotypes, people! Never mind how heteronormative it is!
Ultimately then, Valentine’s Day is a disgrace to romance. It’s makes people feel sad, stressed, trapped, under pressure and poor. This should not be the way to celebrate love and affection.