‘Tis the season for date functions! Date functions are one of the best things about recruitment and are key to Fraternity Rush. They are a freshman male’s chance to show the Frat Brothers and other rush candidates that he is the fantasy of hot dates everywhere, so of course he wants to roll up with you on his arm! This is also a great time for you to get to know your date better and do some man flirting on his behalf, so that everyone knows that you wouldn’t be at this date function unless your boy was something special. Not to mention, date functions are social hotspots where you’ll meet lots of people you may have never met before: girls, guys, and cab drivers.
In order for you to have the date function experience, I’ve come up with a short guide to help you navigate these next few busy weekends:
1. Know your date function
First and foremost, you and your date should be clear on what type of date function you will be attending. This can be difficult since boys have no regard for the importance of being prepared. (Get ready for problems with #3 on this list too; you’ll probably end up asking another girl about appropriate attire because boys don’t get that either).
There are themed date functions, [insert alcoholic beverage] & shackles, kegger skating, and semi-formal. These are your typical date functions, but don’t be surprised of some fraternities have date functions unique to their chapter.
Themed date functions can range from “famous couples” to “the decades”, but no matter the theme, they’re fun because you can dress up with your date. Themed functions are less formal, so let loose and really get into the theme so that you and your date make the perfect pair.
Champagne (among other alcoholic beverages) & shackles is also a common pick. At these, you’ll be shackled to your date, handed a bottle of alcohol, and will not be released until the bottle is cashed. I’d recommend only going to [blank] & shackles if you’re really comfortable with your date (or if you really want to get comfortable with him) and remember it’s a marathon, not a sprint. Kegger skating requires one tip and one tip only: don’t grab onto someone else when you’re falling (and you will fall) because you’ll both end up bruised and battered. Be careful.
Semi-formal is the most important and most glamorous of the date functions. If you’re invited to semi, you must be a 10, because by the time semi rolls around, fraternity rush is more intimate. Guys want a date that they can really count on to help them win a bid and praise from the brothers. Semi usually includes a dinner, a pregame, and a dance portion. At dinner you’ll be sitting with your date and several brothers and their dates, so you’ll want to make a good impression. Semi is also the time to wear that knock out dress; it will save your date the trouble of having to get himself a bid (the brothers will just hand it to him after seeing you all dressed up). Knowing your date function is important so that you can be prepared for the appropriate shenanigans ahead.
2. How to tell whether you’ve been invited as a date or as a friend
Always assume that you’ve been invited as a friend. Don’t get me wrong – flirt like crazy. But let the guy come to you. Trust me, after seeing what an amazing date you are, he won’t just want to be your friend. He’ll come begging for more, they always do. But until then, play hard to get. But because we’re girls we like to read deeply into everything, you can count on the details. If your date gives you lots of details about the function or asks a week in advance, he’s probably considering you a date. If you have to ask for details or if he invites you the day of, he’s probably looking for a friend. When you arrive at the party, if he goes out of his way to get you a drink, take your coat, and introduce you to the brothers you might be a date. But if he leaves you to fend for yourself he probably sees you as just a friend. However, fraternity rush is unpredictable so give him the benefit of the doubt. He obviously likes you enough to spend an evening with you but he also likes the fraternity. So, let him man flirt and give him a chance.
3. What to wear
Date functions are one of the few situations where you should always follow the theme. But don’t forget to look cute too. Go as matching “lax bros”, sure, but leave your male grunt at home; there will be enough of that at the party. Heels and a cute dress stand as a general go-to with most date function events, but make sure that your semi outfit makes a statement. That cut out red dress will do wonders for the frat and your date at semi-formal.
4. How to be a good date
Learn a few things about your date before the function so that you can hold a conversation with the brothers about him. They’ll be impressed if you really like the potential new member and have something to say about him. Ultimately fraternities want guys that girls like because as much as alcohol tolerance is sweet, attracting girls is even sweeter. Always put a good word in for your man. Do be sociable and excited to be there. Don’t drink so much that you vomit and your date has to leave his rush event to hold back your hair. Be assured that your date will take care of you for the night, and thank him for paying for dinner or cabs and inviting you in the first place. Following these tips will ensure a second date in your future.
5. How to ditch your date
On that note, if your date doesn’t take care of you, yuck! Ditch him! Do the classic girl move and have your friend call you an hour into dinner to check up on how its going. Always put a cab number in your phone (Durham’s Best, On Time, Charlene’s, etc) so that you can be ready to call yourself a cab if you need to get out of there. This is the one and only time that you might consider FEIGNING getting sick from alcohol. Though this isn’t good date etiquette but if necessary you can use this technique to get out of a sticky situation. Always be safe and tell a friend where you’re going and who you’re with, and be aware of your surroundings at all times. Date functions aren’t a danger zone but take the right precautions to ensure a safe and enjoyable night.
Also, don’t get yourself ditched. Don’t be a rude date. Don’t hit on other freshmen or fraternity brothers (at least not while your date is in proximity). Don’t be late because your hair “just wasn’t perfect”. Date functions are supposed to be fun and if you don’t like your date, befriend another girl who hates her date too. There’s bound to be one.
6. How to find a date for yourself (because you have date functions too!)
If you decide to join a sorority, you too can have date functions. As a girl, finding a date is much easier. Guys love sorority functions and are always eager to go, so you can take your time and pick and choose. Bring a guy friend, your gay best friend, a “date” date, a potential hook-up, or even a girlfriend but make sure that they are willing to have a good time with you. Nothing is worse than wasting a date function on a date that wants to leave early, eats all the food at the semi, or gets belligerently drunk. Choose wisely. Date functions are a great time to get out there and test-drive a guy to see if you like him enough to date him, kiss him, or say goodbye. But don’t forget, it’s your date function, so make sure it’s all about you and the great time that you deserve to have. Your date should compliment you, especially after you’ve spent so much time complimenting the bros at their recruitment events. Now it’s your turn. Date away!
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Comment below if you have any tips or date function horror stories to add!