From rumours about Avril Lavigne having died in 2003 and being replaced by a body double, to the #FreeBritney movement that started in 2009 and ultimately culminated in Britney Spears gaining freedom from her conservatorship of 13 years, parasocial relationships have forever been an integral part of mainstream media. The way Wikipedia describes it, parasocial interaction refers to ”a kind of psychological relationship experienced by an audience in their mediated encountered with performers in mass media, particularly on television and on online platforms.”
In simpler words, parasocial relationships are one-sided, imagined relationships that an audience tends to foster with their favourite entertainers or media personas. In the past, the extent of relationships of this nature was limited to watching the celebrity of your choice on your television screen or scouring pages of different gossip magazines to find some detail about them in their fine print. But with the age of social media dawning upon us, the imagined part of such relationships has become much more existent and substantially visceral. Earlier, when someone was a hardcore fan of a band, say, Guns N Roses, the almost mandated procedure to be christened fully into the fandom would be to blast all their songs on your Walkman, slap their posters on your bedroom wall, know the names and birthdays of all the members, and probably have a sticker or two of them on your bike. Today, in order to be even considered a ‘real’ fan, one has to go through all of that plus the process of making a Twitter fan account, taking part in fan wars, reading/writing fan fiction, shelling out hundreds of bucks on your favourite celebrities merchandise and concert tickets and basically becoming a personal spokesperson for their agenda and why they are ‘THE BEST EVERYTHING EVER‘. The beauty of it all? The one-sided nature of these relationships just dashes any possibility of rejection right into the dust leaving the fan with the freedom to imagine just any type of interaction with them.
And that, brings us to an important question: Are parasocial relationships good?
The answer: Both yes, and no.
When in a parasocial relationship, you do not just watch the celebrity grow up, but rather you grow up with them. Their every move, their media interactions, their outlook on the world which you absorb with hungry eyes, knowingly or unknowingly becomes your outlook, your attitude and your behaviour. You try to emulate every facet of their being and blend your identity to be as much like them as possible – be it Jojo Siwa fans doing her famous ponytail updo or getting a triangular AV tattoo for Avicii. The feeling of oneness further amplifies when the celebrities give their fans an identity, like ‘Swifties’ or ‘Army’. The whole thing stops feeling like a fan-celebrity interaction and there is a feeling of found family and unity, especially with fellow members of your fandom. Being a fan becomes a major part of your identity.
Many a fan have reported this feeling of being in a fandom, a found family, to have helped them through some of their toughest times. Twitter user @tmhbeckie upon meeting Louis Tomlinson of One Direction fame told him that “Because of you, my parents have a daughter who is still alive.“, and this, is certainly not the only instance. Along a similar vein, the #FreeBritney movement helped Britney Spears win the court case over her life, which would not have been possible without her devout fans who saw her grow up with them and became invested in her life in large proportions. Taylor Swift re-recording her old albums and them still being sold out and sky-rocketing on music charts and the fans boycotting the albums owned by her old record label is perhaps one of the best examples of how parasocial relationships benefit both the celebrity, who gets a loyal fanbase, who feel connected and attached.
However, this very feeling of security and connection can soon turn on its head and take an ugly face when the want gets too…intense. Millie Bobby Brown, best known for her role as Eleven on Netflix’s ‘Stranger Things’, is one of those actors who grew up in the public eye. Recently, when the 19-year-old sensation announced her engagement to her boyfriend, actor Jake Bongiovi, who she had been dating since 2021, the news received less than positive critiques from her fans, many criticizing the actress for her hasty decision. This forces us to question why these fans believe that their opinion on the actions of their favourite matters and ask ourselves whether parasocial relationships are actually as good as we deem them to be, or rather far more overbearing than they should be? The recent drama between Hailey Beiber and Selena Gomez is another such incident that had us all hooked and resulted in Hailey Beiber facing major backlash from Selena fans and Selena taking another break from social media because, as the popstar said, she’s “too old for this”. These are people who don’t know Hailey Beiber or Selena Gomez in person and yet so deep-rooted is their passion that they are ready to torment another person’s mental health in the name of defending their favourite. Such, is the level of ardent passion in these fans that it becomes downright personal and even invasive.
Fans believe that they know their favourite celebrities because they see them on social media or once in a blue moon even get the chance to interact with them there, but what they conveniently forget is social media is just another stage for them to perform and everyone, be it a celebrity or your average neighbour Sally, is putting up a façade there. Parasocial relationships are not something that can ever go away because people will find themselves being drawn to those on the screen and will continue being vested in their lives. What’s important is to enjoy the feeling of oneness and being part of a fandom, but at the same time keeping a steady head on your shoulders while partaking in such interactions and not letting them take control over your life.