As I enter my last few months here at CU Boulder, I get asked so many questions, and the most common question I get now is, “So, you’re graduating; what are you going to do after college?” and for the most part, my answer is, “Well, my mother has already booked my flight home.” This elicits some awkward laughs but it gets the adults in the room to stop wondering. Here is what gets to me: why is it their business? Yes, as a tour guide it is my job to answer these questions, but that question is too personal–it’s like asking me what my monthly rent is, so I have the right to refuse to answer.
I understand that it piques people’s curiosity to figure out what seniors have lined up after college, because if it’s something your child is interested in, then it could give them a sense of security. But for me, that question is bane of my existence, because let’s all be honest with ourselves: the economy is not in our favor right now. Every time I open LinkedIn or Handshake, I can see how many people have applied to a job, and I can tell you that they might be more qualified than me–it’s stressful! It is mid March and I graduate in May. Right now, I am filling out 10 job applications a week, and sometimes two minutes after I fill out an application, I get an automated message that reminds me I am not qualified and they are moving on to other candidates. I always have a feeling they did not read my cover letter, portfolio, and resume all in a span of two minutes. Sometimes looking for a job can be so disheartening that I want to give up, but I can’t. I know that amidst all the painstaking job-hunting, a job will find me or I will find it.
I truly understand why parents ask me about what’s next, but sometimes I need to focus on the present, like passing my final few classes, and actually walking across the stage without falling on my face. We plan to go from preschool to elementary school to middle school to high school and then college, but when college is done, we can set out on our own path. No one has the next steps planned for us and we are free to choose what we pursue. So, how do I know whether I am picking the right path for me? Should I go straight into the workforce or should I go into grad school? Either way, I have to make that decision and hope I pick the right one.
I might never know. I want parents to put themselves in the shoes of us current college students and remember how they felt. I’m sure they wouldn’t like being asked these questions because, and maybe I could be wrong, they don’t have that pressure. Or, they will remember not knowing what’s in front of them. I only focus on the present, and for the past four years, my main goal has been to make it to graduation without a global pandemic shutting everything down like it did before my high school graduation. Now, I am in the final stretch of planning for my future, and I have no idea what it might look like. Will I stay in Colorado or head back to Texas, or will I end up in a completely different state that I did not plan to move to?