I was raised in Thailand, educated in Japan, and went to prom in the U.S. I compared the Denver suburb I went to high school in, to a mannequin in the very essay that got me into the University of Colorado Boulder. People always ask me which country I like the most, but it’s honestly not that simple! But here are some things I’ve learned from being raised in three countries.
- Standards of beauty are different in many cultures.
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If you tell someone from Thailand that you want to get a spray tan, they’re going to look at you weirdly. Everyone seems to want pale skin there. If you walk into a convenience store (a lot of them are in malls), you’ll see that everything from deodorant to face wash claims to whiten your skin. I’ve also noticed that different cultures tend to embrace aging more than others — in Japan, you’re expected to respect the elderly, and my grandparents on my Japanese side always seemed to be proud of being old. It’s weird when I see Hollywood celebrities look 30 when they’re 60, but that’s what happens when each country has its own beauty standards. The only thing that I saw each country have in common is the pressure for women to be unrealistically thin, but I hope that changes soon!
- To not be a picky eater.
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My ex-boyfriend seemed pretty jealous when I ate 500,000 Scoville heat units without batting an eye. I eat ghost pepper salsa on a regular basis. This might have been a product of being raised in Thailand, but it’s also because I’ve been exposed to so many types of food. They can be good! Deep-fried bamboo worms used to be my go-to snack and, as many people know, raw fish on vinegar rice is a gift from heaven. It stops shocking you after a while.
- There’s space for a lot of miscommunication between people from different countries.
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Feelings can get hurt a lot if you don’t understand the humor. Thai humor tends to be more honest and blunt, and that’s just the norm. If you went up to someone here and told them that they’re short, they would probably be hurt. I’ve lived in different countries, so I learned to realize that, even if I might perceive something as offensive, most people mean no harm. The same goes for sarcasm. My dad spends a lot of time in Asia, and he’s a very sarcastic person. But, if he says something like, “that sounds like a GREAT idea”, they would probably carry out the plan. It’s important to be cautious about what you’re saying because words can get lost in translation.
- Middle schoolers are cringy.
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I had the luxury of being a young teen in three whole countries. My Japanese school got to see my One Direction phase, and my Thai and American schools saw my goth phase. These phases obviously weren’t understood a lot of the time (the goth subculture is basically non-existent in Thailand), but most people understood that teenagers are weird. I wasn’t the only one! The guys in my Thai school still drowned themselves in Axe deodorant, and a boy in my Japanese school was obsessed with Hatsune Miku. The human experience is pretty similar in that regard, and it was pretty funny to watch.
- There are different attitudes toward work and school.
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When I first saw how much people studied at my school in Japan, I thought it was abuse. My friend didn’t go home until 10 p.m. when she was 11 years old. The pressure to get into a good college was already there for a lot of my peers. When I look back on it, I realized how ahead they were compared to my high school in the U.S. Back when my dad had a job in America, they saw him as a hard worker. Now his friends in Thailand tease him for being way too serious. “You work too hard” is an actual insult there. I’m currently enjoying the work-Minecraft balance that I’m getting at Zoom University but at least I know how to enjoy the best of both worlds.
- Most people are pretty nice.
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A lot of us are guilty of being pessimistic and saying, “I’ve lost faith in humanity”, each time a minor scandal is posted on social media. Should that be how we see things? Most of the people I’ve met in my life are amazing and talented. Most cultures value hospitality to some level. I’d argue that most people in the world just try to live the best life. The golden rule, “do unto others as you would have them do unto you”, seems to be a part of most religions, so I’d argue that most of us try to be at least decent no matter where we were raised.
That’s what I’ve personally learned from living in different countries. I know many of my friends who have lived in multiple places that have had very different experiences than mine, but I’d say that being raised in three countries has given me some unique perspectives.
Happy quarantine!