In 1973, when my mother was only four years old, my grandparents decided to leave their home in Torino, Italy and start a new life in America. At the time, my mother and grandparents only had enough money for the plane tickets across the Atlantic. With no real plan in place, they left their small hometown and never looked back.
When they arrived in America, they moved in with my grandpa’s brother, Ugo, and his family.
“I don’t remember much from this time, but I do remember having to share a tiny room with my parents. I remember not really understanding what was going on. My parents just kept reassuring me that everything was going to be OK.”
They spent a few months living with Ugo while my grandfather saved up enough money working as a mason to rent their first apartment in the building where my grandfather was the superintendent.
“We made a lot of friends in that neighborhood. There was a courtyard where all the kids would play. I still didn’t speak English but it was just nice to play with kids my own age.”
My grandfather would go to school at night to learn English. He would then come home and teach what he learned to my mother and grandmother.
“Since my mom didn’t work, she would spend her days trying to learn English by watching ‘The Days of our Lives’. Let’s just say any English learned via a soap opera probably wasn’t the most useful or grammatically correct.”
Because of the language barrier and the drastic differences in culture, school was especially difficult for my mother. When she started school in the U.S., she didn’t speak a word of English.
“I dreaded going to school. I had no idea what was going on and didn’t make friends for a very long time. I would eat lunch in the classroom. My only friend was the Spanish teacher. Since Italian and Spanish are fairly similar, I could more or less talk to him.”
My mother and her parents moved a lot, but each time, their new home was a slight upgrade from the last.
“It was the real American Dream. We came to America with nothing. I don’t think my parents really had a plan when we left Italy. They just knew that there was way more opportunity in America, so we left. Eventually, we turned our green cards into passports and became American citizens but that didn’t come easy.”
My mother experienced a huge culture shock when she moved to America. She went from having a huge family filled with dozen of cousins, aunts, and uncles, to only her parents.
“Since we didn’t have a lot of money, we didn’t go back to Italy for almost 10 years. Little by little, my father built a successful construction company, and we were able to go back to Italy for the summers.”
The summertime was the only time that my mother got to reconnect with the culture and family that she left behind so abruptly.
“Since we didn’t have any family in America, we spent the holidays alone which was really difficult, especially when it came to learning American traditions and celebrations. During one of the first Christmases we spent in America, I remember my parents being so confused about Santa. In Italy, we have something similar to Santa but not as extravagant. One of our neighbors dressed up as Santa and rang our doorbell on Christmas eve to deliver me a small present. I have never seen my parents so confused.”
It took my mother and her parents a long time to fully adjust to living in America. And it certainly was not easy. But, through hard work, determination, and a lot of sacrifices, they were able to achieve the true American Dream that was so highly talked about at the time. My family went from having nothing to living very comfortably with a successful business under my grandfather’s belt.
“There were definitely times when my parents wanted to pack everything up and just move back to Italy. I am glad that they decided to stick it through.”