Astrology: Literature Humanities Edition

Finally, the answer to the question you never once asked is here: which required book from literature humanities is your star sign? With our incredibly intricate algorithm based entirely on cold, hard facts (NOT random guessing or personal opinions), we’ve matched the signs to everyone’s favorite lit hum books.

Pisces: Metamorphoses by Ovid

Nothing says a constant desire to escape reality like a book of literal myths. Besides, Pisces tend to be compassionate like Alcyone, wise like Theseus, and artistic like Arachne.

Aries: King Lear by William Shakespeare

Aries are determined, passionate, honest, and tend to be optimistic and courageous. However, they—like a certain King of Britain—can be very short-tempered (Lear’s immediate anger when his daughters refuse to let him keep his one hundred men at their homes), impulsive (Lear’s banishing his daughter and right-hand man at the drop of a hat), and aggressive (both prior examples).

Taurus: Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

Here’s a list of traits Pride and Prejudice characters and Tauri have in common: stubbornness, independence, melodrama, determination, pride, prejudice, and an effortless ability to make people love them.

Gemini: Don Quixote by Cervantes

Gemini: Impulsive. Outgoing. Adventure-prone. Intelligent. A tad unreliable. Don Quixote: Impulsive? Definitely. Outgoing? He sure does talk to every person he meets. Adventure-prone? That’s the entire premise for the book. Intelligent? Technically. Unreliable? More than a little.

Cancer: If Not, Winter by Sappho

I’m not saying all Cancers are emotional artists (a little moody, a little insecure, a lot imaginative), but most Cancers are emotional artists. What art has more emotion, drama, and accidental humor than Sappho’s poetry and poetry fragments?

Leo: Paradise Lost by John Milton

Not to compare anyone to Satan or anything, but Milton’s Satan is for sure a Leo; he is passionate about and loyal to his cause, unwilling to compromise on his beliefs, and majorly wants to be the center of attention, which sounds like a Leo to me.

Virgo: Confessions by St. Augustine

Analytical? Sounds like Augustine. Hardworking? Sounds like Augustine. Overly critical? Sounds like Augustine. Focused on work? Sounds like Augustine. Avoids asking for help? Sounds like Augustine. Hates rude people? Sounds like Augustine.

Libra: Symposium by Plato

Libras tend to be social, diplomatic, and interested in love. They’re also prone to indecisiveness and self-pity, which means they might fit in perfectly in a discussion like the one in the Symposium.

Scorpio: The Oresteia by Aeschylus

Scorpios, like most of the characters in The Oresteia, are stubborn, loyal, and resourceful, but also secretive, distrusting, and even violent. Now, no spoilers or anything, but there are hints of violence and distrust in The Oresteia, so...

Sagittarius: Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky

Sagittarii are known for being generous and idealistic, but also have a tendency toward both impatience and promising more than they can deliver on, just like a certain Rodioch Romanovich Raskolnikov.

Capricorn: The Odyssey by Homer

Nothing says “Capricorn” like a know-it-all blindly marching toward a seemingly unattainable goal, either to reach his family or spite the gods.

Aquarius: Antigone by Sophocles

Aquarii tend to be progressive, humanitarian, uncompromising, aloof, and independent. Sounds like exactly the kind of person who would defy the state to bury their arguably traitorous brother.