“I Would Have Followed You To The End, My Brother…My Captain…My King.”
– Boromir to Aragorn in The Fellowship of the Ring
The Lord of the Rings (LOTR) is my favorite movie franchise of all time. All three movies in the trilogy are stunning, and I could easily watch them all consecutively without getting bored. One of the best parts of the movies is the men. I know that sounds ridiculous, but hear me out. The men in Lord of the Rings are the kind of men I wish I knew more of in real life.
In case you happen to have never seen or read The Lord of the Rings, the basic premise is that twenty powerful magic rings were forged, and one is evil. A Dark Lord called Sauron possessed the one evil ring, and ruled over the Dark Land of Mordor. Eventually during war, Sauron had his ring finger cut off (with the ring on it), and he disintegrated. The human that cut off his finger just needed to throw the ring into the fires of the volcano in Mordor, Mount Doom, but the evil power of the ring overcame him and he kept it instead. Chaos ensues, and eventually we find the ring in the hands of Bilbo Baggins, who gives it to his nephew Frodo. Frodo is charged by the wizard Gandalf to take the ring to Mordor and throw it into Mount Doom before Sauron, who is apparently alive (but more of an evil essence in the form of a giant eye), regains his power.
Frodo and eight others team up to deliver the ring to Mount Doom. All nine of these individuals are men, which may seem like a terrible lack of diversity at first glance (LOTR does have a lot of issues with diversity I want to acknowledge here, but that’s an extensive topic for another article). However, I think that these nine men represent a type of masculinity that I really, really wish more men presented in real life: a strong yet considerate and soft masculinity that brings out the best in men on all fronts.
In LOTR, the men are sensitive and kind, cry in front of one another, embrace one another openly, and even kiss each other on the forehead a few times. Yes, this is a fantasy franchise, and a lot of it seems very sappy, but I’ll be honest, I wish more real-life men were like this. A lot of men I know are so emotionally restrictive of themselves and others. They don’t express affection, make fun of men who do, and masculinity is generally accepted to be an unemotional thing.
Does it have to be, though? The men in LOTR may be affectionate and soft, but they are also strong. Expressing emotion doesn’t mean they can’t kick butt in battle or bear the tough burden of their terrible journey. Traditionally masculine traits like strength, composure, and courage, and assertiveness are totally compatible with emotional availability, sensitivity, kindness, and tenderness. The combination of traditionally masculine traits with these more traditionally feminine ones is exemplified wonderfully by LOTR’s male characters. The problem is that society teaches men that it’s not right to act this way and that they have to be unemotional all of the time.
I am sure I’m not alone in wanting more men to be as sensitive as the men in LOTR. Watching the films, I wonder, why don’t more men act like this? I sincerely want men to know that being emotional is a good thing. It’s healthy for the mind and for society to see more men expressing themselves without bogus societal expectations forcing them to repress themselves.
If you haven’t seen The Lord of the Rings, I recommend watching it and paying special attention to the beautiful emotions the characters express – it’s good for all of us to learn how masculinity can be a more emotional, tender thing through the wonderfully written characters. I hope one day, we can reach a point where men are not afraid to be open.