There are very few events in my life that I would put into the “life-changing” category, but the Summer of 2023 is definitely one of them. Between getting accepted into my dream internship program, traveling internationally to give a presentation to an Icelandic company, and traveling to New York City twice on somebody else’s dime, this summer was definitely one for the books.
Within all of that, though, I spent a lot of time considering what all of these accomplishments mean for my future, especially considering that I would soon be entering the final year of my undergraduate education.
Many upcoming graduates share the anxiety of not knowing what to do after graduation. For a long time, I prided myself on not having this problem, this was until I really began to question my creativity and career choice. Over the summer I got a deeper glimpse of what my life could look like if I continue to take steps towards my expected career, but after girl bossing too close to the sun, I knew that I needed to take a step back and figure out what I really wanted. While the answer was staring me in the face, it took me a while to realize that what I want most in this life is the space and opportunity to be creative.
As I work to throw away imposter syndrome and accept that I am capable of being creative (which is an everyday battle), I’ve had to do the hard work of digging up old misconceptions about what I thought it meant to be creative. This meant breaking down the idea that creatives look a certain way, act a certain way, think a certain way, etc. This process feels never-ending, but I must say that resources like the book The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron have definitely helped. Nevertheless, this discovery helped me realize I am limiting myself based on what I think (and what others think) about the type of creative that I am. I thought my creativity had to be limited to words and had to exist at the intersection of creativity and business. I thought I had to be rooted in something more stable than art, photography, and film. As I continued to accept this, a fire began to grow inside of me that I couldn’t ignore. I began to feel that I had no choice but to step into this new dimension of a creative life, which meant abandoning my plans for breezing my senior year and focusing on finding a copywriting job at a creative advertising agency and opening my mind to the possibility of going to art school.
This revelation hit me hard as I realized that my senior year wouldn’t be as easy going as I had originally planned. As I follow the advice that I’ve heard time and time again-“plant the seeds and see what grows”, I’ve found myself having to make some. I say all of this to say that if I had to give advice to anyone coming into their senior year it would be to stay encouraged when your mind gets clouded with the uncertainty of the future. While the college chapter of our lives is closing, there is a new, exciting one that is just starting. In order for us to make the most of it, we have to embrace the confusion and frustration that comes with the journey.