Breakups suck, trust me I know. In the course of my life (since I was 14), I have found myself in a cycle of breaking up, being single, feeling sad (and I mean, SAD) and within months being in a long-term commitment again. Now, when I say this, most people wouldn’t see a flaw in it. The problem for myself, however, is that I can’t stay single for long. With that said, if I’ve learned anything because of these breakups, it’s that being alone is important. As you can see, I have trouble following my own advice, but maybe you can follow it! Here are some tips I use to make moving on a little easier.
1. Girl, relax. Everything is going to be fine. I can’t tell you how many times I have broken down crying thinking that at the age of 14, the love of my life broke my heart. You have to realize that the best is yet to come. I had this underlying problem that I would think every new boyfriend I got was the “best.” But I promise you, he’s not the best. Every time I would say that, my next boyfriend would be twice as good as the last. If for some reason he isn’t, keep on looking.
2. Keep yourself busy! This is an important one. Try to keep yourself preoccupied. Yes, it’s important to address the situation and be sad, but also keep in mind that healing takes time. You might as well be busy while you’re taking that time! Try a new hobby, join a new club or make a new friend. There is a lot of change happening around the time of a breakup and it’s important to invite new change.
3. Be mature. Even if you don’t like your ex, it’s important to be civil. I would suggest giving each other space for a while before becoming friends. I also wouldn’t do anything immature like starting rumors about them, being mean, changing captions of old photos or anything of that sort. You never know when that will come back to bite you in the butt!
4. Most importantly, remember, you got this. You were happy before him and you will be happy after. Enjoy your friends with your new free time and learn to love yourself again! You have all this amazing, new space in your life to fill with something meaningful. We are rooting for you. We’re all rooting for you!