For the past 3 ½ years of my college career, I have had a boyfriend. Someone I could call at 3 a.m. to make me feel better after I failed a test, someone who would stay up all night studying with me, someone to make me laugh when my roommates were driving me crazy, someone who constantly loved me.
We spent most of our time together through out college. We took classes together, went to each other’s events and hung out with our friends and families. We had our own friend groups but always ended up together at the end of the night. We watched our friends find significant others, date for a while, then break up. This wasn’t our style; with us, one thing was always constant, and that was each other. He quickly not only became my boyfriend but my best friend. I was so thankful to have him in my life.
It’s amazing how five little words can make your life shatter quickly: “I think we should break-up.”
You can try to fight back the tears, pretend like it never happened, but one thing is always true, you can’t say those words and take them back. Luckily for me, it wasn’t a bad break-up. There was no cheating, no lying, or no hatred. It was two adults sitting down deciding it wasn’t the right time to be together and that our relationship wasn’t going to work out anymore.
So that was it. Our 4-year relationship was over, and I was devastated. I lost my boyfriend and my best friend in the matter of minutes.
The healing process began. I cried… a lot. My friends quickly became my support system. They made sure I didn’t feel alone. My best friend told me to text her like she was my boyfriend. In times of need, you realize how blessed you actually are. I was so lucky to have my girlfriends.
As days went by, things got better. Each day got a little easier, and I was able to stop thinking about him so much. I started hanging out with my friends more and having fun again. For the first time in my college life, I could concentrate solely on myself.
Don’t get me wrong, it was and is extremely hard. Especially running into our common friends, not having someone to talk to all the time, hearing our favorite songs on the radio. But, I keep feeling that this will all get easier. Hey, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
With less than two months before graduation, reality is finally setting in. When I was with my boyfriend, I had a fairy tale of me graduating, getting a job wherever he was, and eventually getting married. Now, I find myself asking what I want to do in life and what will make me happy.
I learned in the end, what is meant to be will be. A break-up doesn’t have to be the end of the world. It can be an opportunity for you to live your life and love yourself before loving someone else.