The holidays are just around the corner and, with that, so is unavoidable family time. Now, we love our family, we really, truly do, but sometimes it can be a challenge. We’re all individuals and have our own personalities and interests and ideas. These are things that can sometimes clash when we’re around them for some time.
Here are some things to consider before losing your mind at the next family gathering.
It’s the Holidays
The holidays, whether Thanksgiving or Christmas, are always a stressful time. There’s so much prep to do in terms of foods and house cleaning, so tensions are already high. If someone is being short with you or just being a general annoyance, just give them the benefit of the doubt and assume they’re stressed about getting things perfect.
You Don’t See Them Often
Being in college can strain a family relationship in several different ways. If you’re an upperclassman, then you’re already familiar with the strain that comes with being away at college and having a freedom that you can’t always have when you’re at home. If this is the first time you are returning home for an extended stay, then you will find that the routine you made for yourself at school might not work in the house.
Things will be different, and you might have to suck it up for a bit. Parents won’t always recognize that their baby has grown up into an adult and can make adult choices. Sometimes, this mindset can be remedied by having a conversation with them about how you should be able to make your own decisions. They won’t be used to this independent person you’ve become since leaving home. Be mindful of that and make an effort to spend time with them.
You Gotta Love Them
One of my favorite phrases is “You can love them but you don’t always have to like them.” Love is unconditional, and I am a wholly unconditional lover but liking something/someone definitely comes with some conditions. Yes, your family can get on your nerves, and it can be such a mood killer, but they’re still your family. You should be able to love them no matter what.
If All of That Doesn’t Work Out…
Maybe your family isn’t quite the best and you just really, really, really, really don’t want to be around them under any circumstances for this holiday season. First, I’m sorry that you don’t have a great relationship with them, and I hope you have a good support system elsewhere. Said support system could be an alternative destination for the holiday. I mean, who hasn’t wanted to experience the holidays with your best friend’s or significant other’s family?
It’s okay not to want to be around your family all of the time. Taking a break to avoid unnecessary stress is good for you, but you can’t always avoid the problems you face. Make sure you are okay before moving forward with anything.
We should be thankful for our families. They can be hard to deal with sometimes but somewhere, deep down, there is something we will love about them no matter what. Show your family some love, this holiday season, and thank them for all of the things they’ve done for you; give them some appreciation.