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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

9 Signs He Actually Wants to Date You

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Cal Poly chapter.

We’ve all been there. The “Does he? Doesn’t he?” stage of a relationship where the only signals you get are mixed, and you can’t tell if he wants things to go further or not. And trying to get out of that stage is even harder if you can’t really tell what he’s thinking. Most guys have some subtle tells that show you he’s more interested than he’s letting on…

1. He’s Present When He’s with You and Doesn’t Spend All His Time on His Phone

When a guy isn’t interested, he’ll do his best to ignore you and he’ll end up spending a lot of time on his phone. So, if you guy is present when he’s with you and listens intently, you can tell he’s interested in more than just a hook up with you!

2. He Introduces you to His Friends

We can all agree that the “friend test” is the most important test for a potential significant other. If he introduces you to his friends, you can tell he thinks of you as someone he could be with and feels comfortable and confident enough to introduce you to the biggest critics – his friends.

3. He Makes Subtle Moves

Maybe he just slight brushes your arm, or puts his arm on the back of the couch, but not quite around your shoulder… He’s subtly hinting that he wants to touch you and get your attention to show he’s interested in being more than just friends.

4. He Makes Eye Contact

Eye contact is essential to making a connection with someone. If he’s unwilling to make eye contact with you, he’s intentionally avoiding connecting with you! When a guy makes eye contact while he’s talking to you, he’s showing that he’s engaged in the conversation and wants to make sure you know that what you’re saying is important to him!

5. His Pupils Dilate Around You

The brain responds to looking at things it likes by dilating the pupils involuntarily. If you can spot his pupils dilating while he’s looking at you, you have a clear sign he’s into you!

6. He Shows Interest in Things You Like or Talk About

A guy’s best way of showing he’s not interested is by acting uninterested! If he shows no interest in learning about the things you like or the things you talk about, he might not be as interested in getting to know you as you think!

7. He Occasionally Uses Affectionate Terms When He Can

When a guy is trying to show he wants to be more than just friends, he’ll occasionally slip in an affectionate term where he can to see how you react. Guys don’t just use the word “babe” lightly, so if you hear him slip it into a conversation, you’ll know he’s interested in being more than just friends.

8. He Likes Being Near You

If you go out in a group setting he’ll intentionally stand by you or sit near you or try his best to be around you. Guys like to show that they’re interested in more subtle ways. If he walks closer to you or stands near you when you’re out with other friends, he’s showing that he likes being around you!

9. He Goes Out of His Way for You

Does he offer to give you rides or pick things up for you? When he shows that he’s willing to go out of his way for you, he’s showing you he’s boyfriend material!

Boys can be pretty difficult to figure out, but just look for the subtle tells and make your way from there!

Avalon Cassard is a second-year Journalism major at California Polytechnic State University, San Luis Obispo. She loves french fries, all kinds of music, and anything beach related. She was born and raised in Laguna Beach, California and spent most of her childhood there before moving up to Alameda, a small island in the San Francisco Bay Area. Even though she lives up in Northern California now, she still defines herself as a SoCal girl at heart.