The Real Scoop on Confidence

Confidence has many definitions, but the root of it is a feeling or belief. Confidence is not something we are born with, like most things, it evolves over time. How you feel or what you believe cannot be determined by anyone else, so essentially, no one else has the ability to impact how you feel about yourself or how confident you are...right?  


Well....that sounds good, but in real life, it doesn’t always go that way. Take body image for example, when we constantly see pictures of Instagram models who have that “perfect body” and appear to have the “perfect life”, it’s hard to be 100% confident in your own skin.  Now, add in all the apps that help you change your appearance in photos...which are basically telling you that you aren’t good enough, so here...let us help you alter your appearance to look better to the world...that’s a real confidence booster.


So, here’s what I have to say about that...there is absolutely no need to be 100% confident, in that even a thing?  We all have insecurities, no matter how confident someone appears on the outside, they too have something they are insecure about.  And guess what...that’s okay! I have them, and that’s okay too. But I don’t let them control me or make me feel bad about myself or compare myself to others.  Instead, I focus on self-love and the things I value most about myself because those are the things that matter. How I treat others, how hard I work in school, and my love for my family and friends makes me happy... and happy breeds confidence.  


Confidence is’s going to help you walk in the door and nail that interview, it’s going to give you the courage to stand up in front of the class and deliver that oral presentation, but it’s not necessarily the results of your actions that give you confidence, it’s having the ability to put yourself out there in the first place. Confidence should be that feeling or belief that you are the best version of yourself, and that’s something different for everyone.  I try to be the best person I can be and that’s where my confidence comes from. It comes from working hard in school and seeing it pay off, it comes from putting myself outside of my comfort zone and challenging myself to try new things and create new experiences. It comes from making a friend laugh when she has a had a real sh*t day or dancing like nobody is watching at a party. Confidence comes from comes from creating the life that YOU choose for yourself and not letting anyone else define that for you. It comes from picking yourself up after you’ve failed and patting yourself on the back after a success.  


I saw a quote the other day that really spoke to me.  It said that happiness should not be a destination. It shouldn’t be something we are constantly after and putting off.  We shouldn’t be saying “I’ll be happy when…” We need to be embracing the moments now because “when” may actually never arrive, and you’ll spend your whole life unhappy while you wait for it. Do what makes you happy NOW...because happy people are confident people.... and confident people are beautiful people.