But First, Love Yourself

It is much easier said than done, but practicing self-love is so important. You have to love yourself before you can allow others to love you. Cheesy, corny, and a little ridiculous, but it is true. If you do not love yourself, you will never fully allow yourself to be loved by someone else. Putting yourself first and loving yourself is not selfish, it is important.

How to practice self-love and the definition of self-love are different for everyone, that is why you have to find what works for you. Loving yourself doesn’t mean that you have to end the relationship that you are in or drop your friends. It just means that you should start making a conscious decision to put yourself and your feelings first. This will show you so much about yourself that you did not know and open you up to see the way people treat you and how much they value you, in a way you have never seen.

There will be people who think you’re being selfish for taking the time and energy to do this, but you are not selfish for it. If anything, it should show you that they are selfish and don’t truly support you. If there is anyone in your life that makes you feel less than amazing for any reason, they do not deserve to be in your life because they are not contributing in a positive way.

When it comes to putting your time and energy into things, start saying yes to yourself, and no to others more often. This doesn’t mean you have to block everyone out and sit in your room by yourself, but if you don’t feel like going out with your friends or interacting with people, then say no to them and say yes to watching a movie by yourself. It is okay to take time for yourself and take a break from social interactions.

Growing up, my mother always told me “once you are comfortable in your own skin, other people’s opinions of you will not matter to you” and she could not have been more right. This is something you should learn from learning to love yourself. That other people’s opinions of you really do not matter and neither does their validation. The only opinions and validation that matters, is yours. Once you truly love yourself, you will not care what others think of you and you will never feel valid because of someone else’s validation. 

There is no better time than college to learn more about yourself and to learn to love yourself. College is the perfect time because it is a new chapter in life and you learn a lot about yourself during your four years in college, so why not grow as much as possible? No matter what anyone says, learning to love yourself is not selfish, if anything, it opens you up more and allows you to love others more. You are your longest commitment in life, so take the time to love and value yourself.