In general, relationships are complicated. And when a college student is involved in activities, academic obligations, and work, adding a relationship into the equation doesn’t make life any more appealing. That’s where HOOKUP CULTURE comes in! What is hookup culture, you ask? Simply, it is the culture of engaging in casual sexual activity (intercourse may not necessarily apply). Movies and the media often glamorize hookup culture and, personally, I’ve had some splendid experiences. These experiences have allowed me to formulate the “Pros” of hookup culture below. In addition to reaping the benefits, I also have had some not-so-awesome experiences with this normalized college activity. That’s where the “Cons” come in. (I’ll start on a good note!)
PROS
–It’s totally fun! Who doesn’t love that adrenaline rush you get when you lock the door, shut off the lights, and lock lips (without a parental unit walking in OR worrying about a curfew!)? And when two (or more!) people willingly and ably consent to make out or have sex, fun is to be had!
–No commitment, no worries! Whether your hookup is a one-time thing or a spring break fling, the pressure of commitment would definitely ruin the excitement. Be free of the invisible relationship strings, but also make sure your partner agrees that it is only a hookup (for the time being). Bottom line: mutual communication is essential for any and all hookup scenarios.
–Great stress buster! Maybe it’s just me, but after a day filled with studying and working, my hormones send signals like “Forget about FitRec! You deserve SEXY TIME tonight!” Also, research shows that physical contact increases dopamine and serotonin levels, and as a result, increases your mood!
CONS
–You may take sexual risks that you normally wouldn’t! Engaging with a new partner (or continuously hooking up with a non-committing partner) may lead to sexual pressures or unsafe sexual practices. Be prepared with your own condoms and a plan to voice your boundaries and preferences beforehand. Both male and female condoms are available through Student Health Services’ Condom Fairy program as well as in the Center for Gender, Sexuality, and Activism, free of charge! Take further precaution and visit Student Health Services for free STI/STD testing if you have or have had multiple partners within a year.
–He (or whatever preferred gender pronoun in which you address your hookup) may also be hooking up with your friend! Considering the gender imbalance at BU, it may be hard to believe that a friend of yours may have also had fun with your hookup. But, just trust me on this one and remember that your string-less partner most likely has other partners. In this case, I stress the importance of having a conversation of sex history and preferred birth control methods in order to know what you’re getting into and how to protect yourself from STDs!
–You both may not remember what happened! When I hear someone refer to “hook up culture” I often associate it with the many sexual experiences following alcohol consumption. That being said, many hookups may be unsatisfying or just awful decisions (in retrospect). Although alcohol can be a social lubricant when it comes to hooking up (by shedding your inhibitions), there is a chance your sober self would have made better sexual decisions.
The last outcome of Hookup Culture is a rather neutral one in terms of its pluses and minuses: the notorious label, Friends With Benefits. While FWBs can be super fun in the initial hookup stage, it can get confusing when a partner develops feelings for the other. There is no RIGHT thing to do in this situation (as it also depends whether it is you or your partner that developed the feelings…). Personally, I would advise taking a break from hooking up. However, it is totally up to YOU to decide! Listen to your heart and mind, and hope for the best!
Additional Information for your sexual health!
http://www.bu.edu/shs/wellness/wellness-programs/sexual/condom-fairy/
http://www.bu.edu/shs/wellness/wellness-programs/sexual/sexual-health-supplies/
https://www.plannedparenthood.org/all-access/my-method-26542.htm
http://www.hercampus.com/health/sexual-health/beginners-guide-pill
Photo Credit:
http://www.dailycal.org/2012/05/20/hookup-the-ambiguity-of-collegiate-intimacy/