It’s true. The body-positivity movement worked backward on me. The social media-based movement filled with campaigns and well-meaning posts has produced an unforeseen consequence. In my case, it made me realize that some aspects are my body are bad, instead of just thinking of them as normal, or just not thinking about them at all. Every time I see a post about “loving your (fill in the blank)!!!”, I get the exciting news that a new part of my body is “bad”, and thus is in need of media-induced attention and empowerment. Catching my drift?
I didn’t love my stretch marks for a long time. Actually, I didn’t even know what a “stretch mark” was until I saw a post about them, #lovemystretchmarks. I walked over to the mirror and holy crap. Those lines that I had never before let take up space in my brain were now crowding my head as a negative part of my body, that mass media insisted on glorifying. I was confused. Why had I never realized that these lines are so bad that they needed recognition to be good? Why can’t they just be, um, there? The body empowerment movement on social media, while primarily a positive force in the world, has the potential to be a business of put-downs to bring-you-ups. Another example, you ask? Sure!
My mother used to tell me that I was the curviest of the sisters in my family. Cool, mom. Whatever. I’m gonna go ahead and assume that just means that my waist cuts in at my ribcage. It wasn’t until years later that I saw an Instagram post about how we need to embrace our curves, and how more stores should offer “curvy” sizes. I didn’t realize that curves could be a size. I guess a “curve,” in my mind, was just a shape, I didn’t know that it carried some kind of complex social meaning. I never really thought that the curves needed embracing, I just thought they needed clothes to go over them.
The celebration of those who go against the grain of the OG mass media is great. Good for them. But please, chill out about embracing all of our flaws. I can’t count on one hand how many times I’ve been told to embrace flaws that weren’t flaws in my book until I was told to embrace them. Instead of pointing out flaws so we can highlight and praise them–why don’t we use all of that energy to do something else? Anything else, please.
Look, I know that I am not the biggest girl that has ever lived. But, I do believe that I am more aware of the way that I look than the average person, based on my upbringing. For some background, my mother and older sister are both brilliant, kind, amazing people who also happen to be ex-models, with the bodies to prove it. My little sister looks like them. I’m in the middle, and I don’t look like them. Eating and weight were always somewhat of a touchy subject in my house.
The body positivity movement is great. They’re doing great things, reversing decades of negative sentiments by the media. What they’re doing rocks. However, the movement can have unintentional side effects. It has the tendency of taking a microscope to “flaws” that had never been even considered “flaws” before.
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