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Are You Really “Fine”?

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Bryant chapter.

Fine. The meaning of this word has vastly changed over the years. How many times do you hear someone use the phrase “I’m fine” and actually mean it? Ladies, let’s try to find our way back to its true definition and lose the one that has replaced it. “I’m fine” can mean anything from “I’m having a bad day” to “I’m deeply hurt”. If you find yourself using this term often, try to open up more. This solution is simple, but not easy to execute. When someone asks you how you are, answer honestly- it always feels a lot better when you’re honest with someone.

When you respond with “I’m fine”, what are you concealing? Why are you concealing these feelings? Don’t bottle up the pain you feel inside, we’re all human. Instead, admit to yourself that you have an issue that you need to deal with. There are people out there who love you and want to help you. Your friends noticed how you have been distant lately. Your mother misses seeing you smile. Your brother wants to help you but you won’t let him. The worst thing you can do is push loved ones away when all they want to do is help. Sometimes you push them away because asking for help makes you feel weak and even a little embarrassed. Push these negative feelings away. Next, talk to someone. Your friends and family are there to listen to everything you have to say. Tell them exactly how you are feeling. Tell them how long you have felt that way. Ask them to help you forget about the bad in your life. Once you do this, you have completed the hardest part of the process. Now you listen to what the other person has to say. Together you come up with a solution to help you feel better.

Now in the future when your best friend asks you if anything is wrong, don’t say “I’m fine”. Instead say, “I’m not fine. Can I talk to you about it”? Let’s just stop saying “I’m fine” and start getting real. We know that no one ever is fine when they say it. Let’s learn to open up to others and express our feelings.