The Types of People on Your Floor

Not all of our dorm experiences are the same. Every floor has its own vibe and its own type of people, but most of us can relate to at least one of these. If you can’t relate to one, stop to consider that maybe you are that person. And if you are, don’t be that guy.

 

1. The “let’s hang” Guy

Your floor is the place on campus in which  you’re supposed to feel most comfortable. Your home away from home, if you will. So you want to look however you want and feel at ease. While it’s nice to feel noticed and have a guy that wants to hangout with you, that’s not the vibe you’re looking for when your hair is in disarray and you’re brushing your teeth, rushing  to make it to your God forsaken 9am class. So to all you boys, if you’re trying to scheme, wait till we look cute.

 

2. The Music During All Hours Person

Every dorm has that one person who plays obnoxiously loud music during all hours of the day. It starts in the morning when they  wake up, and continues throughout the day.If If their door is open, it attracts crowds to their room, whether they have good taste in music or not. You can’t help but feel sorry for those who live next to the “Music During All Hours Person.”

 

3. The Way Too In To Unit Bonding Person

I’m “The Way Too In To Unit Bonding Person”’s worst nightmare. I hardly ever hangout with my floor. I totally get having a sense of comradery with the people you live with, but it’s also okay to branch out and have other friends, too. College is about finding new people! I’m sorry that I don’t contribute to the floor GroupMe , but you’re doing great without me sweetie.

 

4. The Mysterious Guy

Ah, the notorious hot guy that lives in your unit. Who wouldn’t want to have some eye candy on their floor? You try to time your interactions with him to a tee. He has sneakers on? Oh I’m just going to head over to the gym in my most flattering leggings. He’s going out tonight? Maybe I’ll time it so we leave Joe’s at the same time and he is forced to accompany me back to the dorm. We see you, mysterious hot guy, you can’t hide.

 

5. The Girl You Exclusively See in the Bathroom

Most of us like to take our sweet time in the communal bathrooms. We wash our face, shave our legs, do our hair, and apply an absurd amount of products to our skin. But no one can compare to that one girl who is in the bathroom every time you walk in. Does she live in there? Or does she happen to be there every time I am? Or maybe she is stalking me?

 

6. The Guy That Smokes Constantly

Hey, we all take advantage of Brown’s overall pretty chill environment, but this guy really grinds my gears. This may be an unpopular opinion, but I’ll be the first to say that I’m against smoking in the dorms. If it’s a Friday or Saturday night, go for it. Maybe even Wednesdays because we all love supporting our local businesses (ahem, Whiskey’s). But if it’s a regular school night and I’m trying to get through a hundred pages of reading and six problem sets, I’m not exactly trying to get contact high. Not only does it reek, but it’s a reminder of all the fun things you could be doing instead of grinding out your work.

 

7. The Person Whose Name You Can’t Remember (and you’re in way too deep to ask)

If you’re like me and  really bad with names, you can definitely relate to this one. We’re almost a month into the school year, and the “Hi, my name is __, what’s yours?” phase is pretty much over, especially in your unit. There’s that girl who lives directly across from you whose name you have definitely been told, but you can’t ask her again.You see her everytime you go to shower, and you want to say hi, but it's inevitably awkward since you have no clue what her name is. It’s even worse because she knows yours.