“Daddy issues” is a term made popular through the media, meaning a girl has an absent father or toxic father. These girls are more likely to be attracted to older men or stay in abusive/toxic relationships longer. As much as the term was meant as a definition, men have made it a term to put down women for something that isn’t her fault. Society has made it okay for this toxic masculinity to flourish. A girl with daddy issues is often labeled as a slut or whore and a sex-obsessed human. However, every case is different. Some women withdraw from the male gaze, while others go for any guy that will give them the time of day — something they never got from their father.
At the young age of 14, I was labeled as having “daddy issues,” a label you don’t even fully understand at the time. Growing up with “daddy issues” sadly became my personality for a while. I went from the good girl who didn’t swear to the girl who was always looking for validation in the wrong places. I became whoever a guy wanted me to be. I got so many conflicting opinions from guys on who I was and what I deserved. Some say, “Oh don’t go for that one, she’s got daddy issues written all over her.” Others will say, “Of course you can call me daddy” and then there are the others that say all the right things and give you that validation you so badly crave. The sad part is most girls with daddy issues push away the ones that would be so good to them. I ruined my chances with a genuine and kind-hearted boy more times than I can count. As much as you don’t want to have “daddy issues,” you’re scared of leaving the toxicity because it’s all you’ve known. If you expect a guy to let you down, it hurts less than a good guy letting you down. The toxic guys feel the most like home.
The truth about “daddy issues” is that you’re never going to be able to put a definition to it. Every situation is different. I believe that if society was able to drop the misconceptions around the term, woman and girls would have a far less difficult time embracing their true personality. To any girl who is struggling with the concept of “daddy issues,” don’t let anyone tell you who you have to be in order to fit in society’s cage. Embrace your “daddy issues.” Don’t be ashamed of who you are or your experiences.