There are a lot of things I look forward to about summer break. I’ll get to see my dog again, catch up with my family, go to the pool, spend more time outside, and of course, eat a home cooked meal. I certainly won’t miss the last few weeks of stress because of finals and end-of-year project due dates.
Yet, when I look to the summer, it feels very bittersweet. Even though I’m happy, I’m tinged with a bit of melancholy. I didn’t really experience this in grade school or throughout high school; it’s another thing unique to the college experience. I think the source of my melancholy stems from a changing environment. I’ve gotten used to living on a college campus nine months out of the year, and it feels like a sharp adjustment to depart from that. There’s also a lot of fear, at least for me, about becoming an upperclassmen. I certainly don’t feel like I am halfway through college. I still feel like I have so much learning and growing left to do, and it’s all going by so fast. The biggest source of these blues, of course, is that I’ll miss my friends and partner dearly. We all live together, get our meals together and go out together. Going from a tight-knit, ever-present friend group to having to say goodbye just doesn’t feel right.
When I talk to my friends, I’m not alone in this feeling. Some people are looking forward to going home, others are dreading it, but everyone is experiencing these blues to an extent. Knowing that other people are going through what I’m going through definitely makes me feel better about it. We’re making plans to visit each other and FaceTime, which will definitely fight some of the lonely feelings. And hey, summer is only temporary. Pretty soon I’ll be back for fall semester and wishing I was back at the poolside!