Contrary to many common beliefs, a serious college relationship is possible. After a year with my high school boyfriend, I was undoubtedly nervous about going to college and how it would affect our relationship. What I found, though, was that it was one of the best things to happen to us. So, I thought it would be helpful to share some of the tips and expectations that were learned throughout my personal experience, as well as through the experiences of other couples that I know who have made it work in college.
- Embrace the change.
College is a time to learn and grow as an individual, for both you and your partner. It’s good to accept from the beginning that things can and will change, including your relationship. Don’t worry, this is good! It’s up to the couple if they want to grow closer together, or further apart. Change can seem scary at first, but it can be one of the best things to happen to your relationship! Focus on being the best you, and your partner will follow your lead.
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Honesty really is the best policy.
The tip that I cannot stress enough is being completely open and honest with your partner. This was especially hard for me at first, since I never liked hurting anyone’s feelings or speaking up about something that needed to be said. Eventually, I figured out how necessary it was to the relationship. If something your partner did or said bothers you, and you don’t explain that to them, how are they supposed to fix it? By holding things like that to yourself, you can start to feel angry towards the person you love, without them even knowing why! The more you communicate with one another about your thoughts and feelings, the closer the two of you will be.
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Keep things fresh.
It’s true what they say about being broke in college, but that doesn’t mean the two of you can’t go on fun dates anymore! Colleges have so many unique and exciting campus events that are little to no money for its students. My personal favorite is Bloomsburg’s midnight pizza and karaoke, and it’s easy to turn something simple like that into a really nice night out. Getting creative is key! My boyfriend once surprised me with a meal set up at one of the on campus picnic tables that we always eat at, complete with pizza and fries. It was a simple gesture that really made an impact!
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A for effort
You get to college and think, “No dress code equals sweatpants every day” – at least that was what I thought. I quickly realized this was not the way to go. Even though you already have a boyfriend or girlfriend, it’s really important to show that you still want to make an effort for them. Getting lazy and no longer wanting to impress your partner in any way can be a venom to the relationship, and he/she can even take on the same state of mind as you. This is not suggesting by any means that you should dress up every day, but that extra effort you take into cutting your trusty sweat pants out of your outfit a couple times a week, could make the difference.
All in all, nothing is set in stone. Relationships change and people change, and you can never predict the future. Just be open and ready for anything that may come your way, and enjoy the college experience to the absolute fullest!