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Who Cares Less

You’ve heard the story: boy meets girl, girl likes boy, boy asks girl out. All should go according to plan, right?

Instead, everyone tries to downplay how they are feeling. No one wants to admit that they are really into someone for fear of that person turning around and saying, “Eh.” Everyone’s worst nightmare is to be labeled as the one who is more invested in the relationship.

“Do you like him?”

       “I guess, he’s okay.”

“Did the date go well?”

      “ It was fine. No big deal.”

“So do you want to be exclusive with him?”

      “I’m cool with whatever.”



Naturally, the fear of getting burned leads us to deny any bit of feelings that might be present. This juggling act, also known as the “who cares less” game, is not worth it for a number of reasons:

·      It leads to mixed signals

·      It makes you seem disinterested

·      It starts out the relationship on an unstable foundation

·      It promotes people hiding their true emotions

·      It hurts everyone involved

·      It’s dishonest

But wait – guys like a chase. Think: Play hard to get, be out of reach. You’re thinking that if you show how interested you are, then the chase will be over and so will your “thing” (because you wouldn’t dare to call it a relationship). While I’m not going to lie to you and tell you that there aren’t guys who lose interest once they know they’ve got you on their hook, this type of guy isn’t the kind of guy you should be dating anyway.

While asserting your power might feel scary, uncomfortable, and awkward, expressing your feelings will only benefit you in the long run. The right guy will appreciate your honesty and both of you will live without the fear of the other walking away. Keep in mind that the right guy won’t be into the chase, he will be into you. He’ll appreciate that he found the right girl without having to play by someone else’s rules. So join me in quitting the game of ‘who cares less’, and the next time a guy asks you out, show your excitement with a spur-of-the-moment “yes” dance.

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