You’re guilty of it. I know you are. I’ll prove it to you. Take this typical scenario: you are walking into the Chocolate Bar and a few feet in front of you is a boy you recognize from last weekend. Yup, that boy… you two shared a “moment” in the Mods last weekend but now every time you look at him, you get the weirdest gut feeling. So you have two options really: do you (A) smile and say hey or (B) pretend you don’t know him at all and walk right on by? Most common response: Option B. The force at hand: “The BC Look Away.”
The BC Look Away is the quickest way to avoid anyone on campus whether one is in a hurry, not in the mood to make conversation, or even more commonly, unwilling to approach someone that they may have had a “thing” with. Let’s be honest, we’re all guilty of the BC Look Away at one time or another. But what has always bothered me so much about this “BC trend” is how unwilling we are to face our past actions. Do we feel, in some way that hiding our head and walking by quickly will just erase history? Are our decisions, fueled by alcohol and hormones, something we should be so embarrassed about that we go to the point that we ignore each other? Seriously, since when did the “cold shoulder” become the proper and universal way to say, “I’m not interested?”
Perhaps the BC Look Away exists because each of us fears that if we initiate conversation, we may be stood up or ignored. The feelings we feel, or felt, for someone else may not be mutual, and it is this fear of denial that motivates us to walk by one another and avoid conversation. What if we were to initiate conversation instead of just walking away? Imagine the possibilities. We could be jump-starting potential friendships, relationships, and even possible life-long partners; it all starts with is a simple “hello” and “how are you?”
I’m certainly not implying that we need to fall in love with everyone we meet on a random Friday night. But what I am saying is that we need to learn to respect each other and ourselves. As someone who has done the BC Look Away, I can say that it never makes me feel good and only leaves me feeling even more empty afterwards. What are we demonstrating to ourselves? That we can just erase our memories and our past actions by ignoring them? I would much rather hear from the person themselves that they aren’t interested, rather than see them walk by me and attempt to look distracted on their smartphone. So before you decide to do the BC Look Away next Monday morning, think about the other person. How would you feel to be on the other side of that equation?