At this point in our lives, it’s pretty common for us to know what it is like to be in long distance relationships, or we have friends that have experienced a long distance relationship. You could go to a different college than your significant other, your relationship could be from back home, your sweetheart could be abroad for the semester, or you may even have an online relationship. Take it from me – long distance relationships are not always easy. There are miscommunications between people, there are third parties always weighing in about your relationship, and there are those days where you know everything would be better if they were just… here. Sometimes, long distance doesn’t work, and that can be for many reasons. If you want to keep the long distance relationship thoughtful and fulfilling, try to follow these guidelines:
Do: Keep In Touch
It’s really easy to get caught up in your own life in the environment that surrounds you. Classes, friends, work, and extracurricular activities all consume your thoughts, and from time to time it’s possible to forget about what’s not in front of you. Make sure to remember your significant other throughout the day, and let them know you are thinking about them. A simple text can make a world of difference!
Don’t: Flood Their Inbox
Instead of getting caught up in school life, sometimes we get caught up in our relationship. While it’s important to talk to your boyfriend or girlfriend, don’t send them texts all day, every day – especially if they are not texting you back at the moment. If you are sending a lot more texts than you’re receiving, then you could be seen as needy or annoying (and that’s not good for a relationship).
Do: Find Other Ways of Communication
Texting can get a bit boring if that’s the only form of communication between you and your boyfriend or girlfriend. There are many more ways you can communicate. I suggest the very cliché love letter. There’s something about putting pen to paper that lets my emotions actually come through. Another higher-tech way to communicate is through Skype. It’s a great way to get to see each other without actually being together. And of course, there’s always a phone call if you’re missing their voice.
Don’t: Expect A Surprise
In long distance relationships, it’s sometimes difficult to know what the other person is thinking. There will always be a moment, whether it be on Valentine’s Day or your anniversary, where you think, “Of course they’re going to come here and surprise me!” Well, when you think that, you’re potentially setting yourself up for disappointment. It’s nice to have ideas of what you’d like to have happen, but it’s necessary to understand that there are reasons why they can’t be there in the first place, or why they haven’t sent you a gift. Try talking things out and planning something, instead!
Do: Talk To Other People
Having a great support system is essential for a long distance relationship. There WILL be a time when you’re extremely upset and just want to cry as you watch The Notebook. This is when you want your friends to be there the most. Branch out from your relationship bubble, and have people with you that can keep you occupied and genuinely happy.
Don’t: Do Anything Else With Other People
This shouldn’t need to be said, but don’t try cheating on your significant other. If you have feelings for somebody else, or aren’t happy with your relationship, just be open about it. If you are willing to do something so harmful to your relationship, then you probably shouldn’t be in the relationship.
Do: Be Honest
There’s absolutely no reason to lie about something in a relationship. If you did end up cheating, tell them. If you’re feeling uncomfortable about something they’re doing or somebody they’re with, tell them about it. If you lie, it’s easy to get away with it in a long distance relationship, but there is no reason you should have to (or want to). A relationship is based off of trust – don’t abuse that.
Don’t: Be Too Honest
Telling them how you feel about your relationship is great. Telling them how you feel about what they are up to is great. Telling them every single thought you have about their friends, their choices, and their opinions? That’s not so great. If it’s going to hurt your relationship, think about if it’s a rational thing to say and complain about.
Do: Cherish Time With Them
The time that you get to spend with your boyfriend or girlfriend is something wonderful. Whether you get to go home and see them, or they come and visit, that is your time to really connect and enjoy each other’s company. The time you’re away from each other is worth it as long as you make sure to make the most of all the time you have together. Long distance relationships can work, and the time together with them can help you realize it.
Photo Sources:
http://getcluedincolorado.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/iphone_messaging.jpg
http://rantsofasassystew.com/2011/12/a-love-letter-to-2011-and-you-buckl…
Samantha Schroeder
http://scoopempire.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/long-distance-relation…