I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been out on a Friday or Saturday night only to have a drunken conversation with a girl who proceeds to tell me that I am going to be her new best friend. I hate encounters like this- I think they totally cheapen the meaning of friendship. I’ve always been a firm believer that quality is more important than quantity when it comes to friendship. However, this means that I tend to put all of my eggs in one basket, which oftentimes leads to me worrying or overanalyzing situations that most people would just brush off as not being a big deal.
In my opinion, girls have it so much harder than guys do when it comes to friendship. For starters, when a guy is mad at another guy, he gets mad and then he gets over it. Whereas with girls, it can be weeks before you even find out that your friend is actually mad at you. This is the thing that constantly worries me in my own friendships; I hate not knowing whether or not someone is mad at me. I’d much rather have my friends tell me what I did wrong so I can fix the situation and we can move forward in our friendship.
Fortunately, it seems like girls at BC, compared to the girls I went to high school with, are much more open when it comes to fighting (especially the girls that I live with). But, I still think girls have a natural tendency to use passive aggressiveness when dealing with their emotions, rather than actually confronting them head on.
I wonder if the reason that it seems most BC girls are willing to share their emotions amongst their friends has anything to do with the fact that we don’t have Greek life. With sororities being absent from the social scene, it gives us girls the opportunity to find friends based off of our interests and allows us to branch out and meet people we might not otherwise meet if we felt we should only hang out with our “sisters.”
Now, don’t get me wrong, I think there are plenty of positives to having Greek life on college campuses. I’m just saying I think it’s nice that at BC we have the opportunity to make friends with people we might not have the opportunity to know if we felt we were pigeonholed to one specific group.
Friendship is one of the most important components of a person’s life. It allows you to build a deep bond with someone who may or may not be anything like you. It’s something that should be embraced and not cheapened. However, in order for friendship to remain in its purest form, it’s absolutely necessary for girls to stop with this passive aggressive behavior and just be open and honest with their friends about how they feel on certain situations. After all, if that girl is truly your friend, she’ll appreciate hearing your concern from you and NOT from the five other people you may have told.
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http://www.theaccidentalitleader.com/it-manager/your-next-it-manager-cha…