16 months. 16 months filled with uncontrollable laughter, unforgettable moments, and absolute bliss. Time was dwindling and we both were counting down the days until I’d be on the plane that would take me 1,820 miles from my home. Although I knew that acceptance letter in the mail from Arizona State University held my future for the next four years, it had me questioning things unrelated to school. Can we even make this work? How challenging will it be? This next step I’d be taking in my life would cause me to take a huge risk. Yep, I would have to experience those dreaded three words—long distance relationship.
If you’re like me and feel like you’re the only one facing this challenge, you’re not alone. 75 percent of college students endure a long distance relationship at some point during their college years. So, despite all those remarks on being absolutely insane, we decided our 16 months together weren’t going to end simply because of the number of miles standing between us. If you’re in a long distance relationship of your own, follow these tips to live up to the line ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder,’ and you won’t have to put yourself in geographical misery to keep that relationship going strong.
1. Communicate. A fundamental factor in maintaining any successful relationship—communication. Expressing feelings and talking about things shouldn’t be ignored, especially when it comes to long distance. Although being on opposite sides of the nation makes this a bit more challenging than the average relationship, there’s plenty of links to stay connected even miles apart. Aside from texting, phone calls, and handwritten letters, Skype, FaceTime, and Snapchat mesh talking and seeing your loved one, making conversations ten times more special. The age of technology makes those simple conversations about your days that much more significant, so take advantage of it.
2. Trust. This is an underlying cornerstone in a long distance relationship, or any relationship for that matter. Knowing your significant other is exploring new places and meeting new people can certainly be difficult to wrap your head around at first. Any doubts will slowly take the relationship for a detrimental turn. Not being there can fire up some trust issues, but you must remember that you want them to be as happy as possible.
3. Focus. Don’t spend all your time dwelling on the negative aspects of being in a long distance relationship. You’re at college to study, and being apart from each other means you won’t be racking up all your time snuggling up next to him on weeknights. Keep your head up by staying busy with studying and maintaining good grades. Join an organization, get a job, play a sport. There are plenty of different things to do on campus to keep you occupied from wallowing in your sorrow all day, every day. Stay optimistic and I promise your days will be easier to get through, and remember: every day that passes is a day closer to seeing each other.
4. Plan. Things start to get overwhelming and frustrating after time apart, so make sure to schedule time to see each other (of course, if funds allow it). Whether it’s a drive, train ride, or flight away, nothing compares to being reunited with them once again. I suggest you try to see each other once a month. Counting down the days until you reunite again makes the time apart seem a lot more bearable.
I’ve certainly learned that absence truly does make the heart grow fonder. While long distance relationships are a bittersweet love story, they’re absolutely manageable, and I’m living proof. If two people truly want to be together, they will do anything to make their future together a reality. All those seconds, hours, minutes, and days apart may be worth it in the end, but you won’t know unless you go ahead and try it for yourself. Love will always find a way.