Have you ever felt burdened by social media, its glitz and glamour? How does everyone’s life seem so perfect, even though everything there is to know about them is out there for the world to scrutinize? How is this a mode of communication, a way to update even our loved ones?
The hasty need to be perfect, coupled with the desire for validation (and maybe a cup of popularity), devoid of even a pinch of one’s interest, one’s actual everyday routine – is what social media is. Granted, it is also a great tool to explore interests, meet people of similar ideologies, share experiences & grow alongside others. It is an opportunity to express yourself, to show who you are, and to know that the world is watching and they are judging every nook and cranny of your persona that they can see.
Have you ever felt pressured by social media? Could you lose who you are in the quest for being the perfect role model with everything figured out?
Have you ever felt belittled and mocked by social media? Like life was laughing right at you while all these people online got the better deal, the lower end of the stick?
Maybe you haven’t, you know. Perhaps this is another cruel joke. This age of the internet is playing on me, and I’m alone in this feeling, this thought. You may feel empowered, loved, supported & validated by social media, and you are a part of the confident, put-together gang. You love life and sharing yours with the world – you feel completely secure and happy with who you are because you’re perfect, right?
It goes like that sometimes. I’m not saying social media is terrible; I’m not asking you to uninstall every app on your phone. Social media is an excellent way of sharing milestones and keeping in touch – but although it may seem like it, it could be better just like the people on it are.
If you resonated with any of this self-doubt and have been struck by this line of thought at any point, the Netflix film Kho Gaye Hum Kahan is for you. It traces the tale of three friends through – well, through life. Starring Ananya Pandey, Siddhant Chaturvedi and Adarsh Gourav, the film seems like something we’d see in our everyday lives with mutual friends.
Ananya Pandey plays Ahana Singh, and Siddhant Chaturvedi plays Imaad Ali – two best friends in a ‘spaceship’, living together but each having their own space. Ahana is a successful corporate consultant, but when her picture-perfect life, & relationship with long-term boyfriend Rohan Bhatia (played by Rohan Gurbaxani) crumbles around her, we see how she resorts to social media to stalk her ex and show him what he lost through reverse psychology – she posts happy pictures, goes on fake dates – the works.
Imaad Ali is a stand-up comedian basing jokes on his life and those of his friends as content. When not doing comedy, he’s either seeking therapy to overcome the wounds from the past or swiping on dating apps. Doesn’t that sound familiar? That’s what the dating scene is like for us, too. His perspective changes when he meets Simran (played by Kalki Koechlin), but his quest for fame online prevents him from changing his ways.
The third part of the trio, Neil Pereira (played by Adarsh Gourav), is a gym trainer who aspires to start a chain of training centres. He hopes to one day have some big celebrity clients at his gym, & spends most of his time training Lala, an influencer, and being her ‘ideal boyfriend’. I mean #CoupleGoals toh hona chahiye, na? Each one of them is trying to become something in life, and in the process, they discover how trying to remain connected virtually has made them forget what real life looks like.
Very different from one another in personal and professional aspects, this trio comes together to be supportive & fun friends and are always there for each other. Their friendship could be contrasted with Bunny, Aditi & Avi from YJHD. There is empathy, there is love, there is understanding, there is craziness – All In equal parts. They find comfort (or torment, too) in each other and in scrolling through others’ lives online.’Their stories of heartbreak, romance and ambition collide not in the real but in the virtual world, which lies at the heart of Kho Gaye Hum Kahan.’
Though laden with many different (& essential) social issues, the movie lacks heavy monologues and lectures. Instead, the lack of substantial plot twists & surprises makes it seem so organic – like it could be our day-to-day lives; it is so impactful & relatable. It makes you aware of the evils of social media, showing the shallow outlooks of those online and making you question (& regret) your virtual existence.
A line in the movie describes exactly what it leaves you feeling, what our lives have come to, “Social media makes you feel that you are more connected with people around, but in reality, you have never been more lonely than this.” This reality check, directed by Arjun Varain Singh, is incredibly apt and well-timed today, and I recommend watching it.
(Anyways, chalo – thanks for reading, but enough of scrolling on your phone.)