At the start of our study abroad program, we spent two nights in Madrid, staying in a hotel, exploring, and getting to know each other. But Sunday eventually came around, and we boarded our bus to travel to Salamanca. In the first hour, we chatted happily, excited about the upcoming semester, but as we got closer, we slowly got quieter. Why, you might ask? Because one the components of the immersion program was a home-stay, and we were all horribly, dreadfully nervous. We had received info about our moms, but it consisted solely of their jobs, their names, where they lived, and whether they had any kids or pets. My nerves were not soothed by the fact that I had heard my neighborhood was a tad sketchy.
My program director called me to the front of the bus. “Tian Lee, when I first got your application, before I got your photo, I thought your name was Lee, like a boy. So I put you with a family that usually has boys… but I think they’re great! Your host mom is one of my favorites! But if there is a problem, we’ll just switch you to a different house. And the dangerous area is behind your house, not exactly your neighborhood. I just thought you were a boy, but I think it should be fine…” Not exactly the thing to tell me to calm my nerves.
As the bus pulled into the lot where our families waited, we began all guessing which mom was ours. Quite frankly, they all looked nervous too. I guess no one wants to have a dud for a family member. My best advice for a good home-stay experience is to be as open as possible. Of the people in my program, the ones who have the best relationships with their families are the ones who try to have conversations, those who ask questions, those who tell their mom when they like or don’t like something. You’re creating a connection from nothing, so you have to supply at least some of the material for the relationship. There are going to be language difficulties and cultural differences, but if you try to talk to your mom, she will like the effort and you can become friends.
My family is actually great. My mom, Rosa, is extremely welcoming. And since she usually has boys, I think she likes having a girl to talk to. Within the first several days, she asked me about my boyfriend (“Oh, if it gets hard to be apart, it is going be okay!”), we bonded over boys’ general dislike of vegetables, and she gave me some traditional Salamanca earrings because “they seemed like your style!” My 10-yr-old brother, Alejandro, is funny and likes drawing monsters: “Listen, every single one I draw is different.” And Rosa continually reminds me, “This house is your house, OK? Be comfortable! If you need something, take it, OK? Or ask me for help, OK?” I have also bonded with the two cats, and, very important for a food-lover like myself, all of her cooking is delicious. It seems thus far that all of my fears and nerves were for nothing.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Amherst chapter.