We’ve all done it. Sometimes, when we feel insecure, we post a photo on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram with a caption along the lines of “I’m so fat and ugly!” hoping for someone to tell us we aren’t. While this doesn’t seem like a big deal, this is something that needs to be stopped.
Insecurity comes in all shapes and sizes. People don’t like certain parts of their bodies, personalities and everything in between. But when we deliberately post pictures (that we know we look good in) and put captions that clearly call for attention, we’re only fueling the “discrediting fire.” When people have real insecurity issues, like Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Anorexia or Bulimia, it’s easier to dismiss them with wanting attention. And when you post photos to just gain compliments, it’s only helping society’s claims that insecure men and women are just “looking for attention” when they’re actually seeking help.
An “Ask The Psych” article explores why people tend to “fish” for compliments on social media sites. Dr. George Simon notes, “They might not get a sense of genuine regard from you and might engage in covert acts designed to manipulate you into affording them some recognition.” He states that while the person posting may have insecurity issues, they gain a sense of power by placing the bait over someone’s head. Not everyone who is saying they’re “fat” or “ugly” really means it—they’re looking for someone to give in and tell them that they aren’t—and that’s not right. It isn’t fair for someone who is being honest about how they’re feeling to be undermined by another person who is perfectly confident in their self posting that they hate how they look. Some girls have real, pressing problems that are much bigger than getting 50 likes or 20 “you’re perfect” comments. Compliment fishing is completely wrong and really strengthens the idea that insecurity is nothing more than just attention seeking.
Please don’t be that person! You are beautiful, smart, funny and everything in between—you don’t need random Facebook friends to tell you that. Be confident in what you post! #Makeup or #NoMakeup, #Filter or #NoFilter—you don’t need someone else’s approval to gain self-confidence. If you’re ever feeling low, talk to somebody in private—don’t post it on your newsfeed.
Photo Credit: reddit.com and funnyjunk.com