We all dream of the kind of life we hope to lead, that dream job we hope to have, and dream home we hope to live in one day, or that dream car we hope to buy one day.
There is the vision of the end goal, and the path is taken to reach it is never linear.
Now those ups and downs are apart of the journey, but sometimes when we’re down, we stay down and self-sabotage out of fear of reaching success to just be let down in another way.
The fear of that uncharted territory of success. Where we now are held to a higher level of responsibility and we must perform to that bar we set. Think about it, this huge change … do we really want it … why is there comfort in the “if it doesn’t happen then it was meant to be” cliche? Pessimistic and doubtful thoughts like
“Is this what I really want?” “What this doesn’t work this make it and this isn’t for me?”
Thoughts like this lead us to trip ourselves and possibly not give this dream all we got.
Often times in speaking about the success the conversation is steered towards the fear of failure rather than the fear of success itself. Giving that thing in our hearts all we got is overwhelming. This idea of going after our dreams and reaching that goal we wanted so bad to then not want it. Adjusting to that new norm can be scary.
When you don’t try and put in your best effort the result is not because of fate, maybe it is because your try wasn’t your hardest. Maybe your try was half assessed. Sounds harsh, but its real food thought and may apply.
Tips to Avoid Self-Sabotage:
- Resemble the habits of people who are successful. Seek a role model or figure who is where you want to be and study their steps.
- Challenge yourself to stop the habits you KNOW are holding you back: Sleeping in, addiction, pessimistic thinking, that person who takes up time be off used to elevate yourself
- Want it as much as you want to sleep on those nights you’re up studying and would rather see your bed than another read over your notes.
- Fake it till you become it. Pretend like you’re comfortable, pretend like you know what you’re doing lol, and one day you will
- Stay inspired and onto the next step through research, reminding yourself of your goal, and reading inspirational quotes or mantras when you feel like your losing steam (because it will happen.)
- Plan. Plan. Re-Plan. In order to reach this dream, one must plan accordingly and device steps that could be taken to reach that accomplishment.
Now I’m no expert and I am nowhere near where I wish to be as a 20-year-old Junior in college. However, there are tools that I learned thus far and that are helping me on my journey.
I learned we are all good at something. Literally, just one thing we can do right and love to do. There is no way we were placed here to waste space. Finding that reason or destiny is a difficult task, but if it were easy everyone would do it. Our challenge is to go there and create that person we want to be, rather than discover, “there is no self to be made, only the self to be discovered”. Discover new parts of you in pursuit of your dreams. Don’t think about falling while you dream of flying.
“When you focus on problems you get more problems. When you focus on possibilities, you have more opportunities”
~Zig Zigar