Every collegiate has her struggles, no matter her year, major, etc. However, being a second-year biology major, I would be the first to defend my fellow nerds that I spend 99% of my days with in the science building. Sure, to outsiders, we’re just a group of overambitious, overachieving science nerds who complain about how difficult our courses are or how lengthy our schedules are, but we’re really much more than what means the eye. This article’s for all the bio nerds out there who may find themselves saying some of these things once in a while (or maybe about as often as a new Kardashian scandal hits the tabloids). If you’re not a bio major, stick around as you may recognize some of these words from your science-loving friends or maybe you’ll learn something new about those kids who never seem to see the light outside the science building.
1. “Quick…sniff me. Do I stink!?”
You walk into the lab for your weekly required class and a certain stench just smacks you straight across the face. If it’s not an 8am class (because we all know how much longer things take to process that early in the morning), a light bulb may go off in your head as you realize today’s digestion day. After two and a half hours of cutting open some poor, innocent animal, you rush out to meet your girls for your next class. Hopefully you brought some perfume in case that nasty stank lingered.
2. “Sorry, I can’t go out. I have to do my lab reports.”
Being a bio major myself, I may be biased when I say that science majors probably have some of the largest workloads. But let’s face it, when we’re taking the same amount of credits as every other full-time student on campus, in addition to having 2.5-5 hour required labs for almost all of our required courses (which, by the way, we don’t even get credit for), it’s pretty safe to say that us bio majors are drowning in coursework for 99% of the semester (God bless the first day of class when the only lessons of the day are the course syllabi). Therefore, if your best friend/boyfriend/girlfriend can’t go out because of schoolwork, be understanding. Trust me, they’d much rather spend the day with you than trying to memorize all 206 bones of the human body.
3. “I want to be a doctor. In what part of their careers do doctors need art?”
As science majors, we have things that aren’t exactly our strongest suit such as English, history, art, etc. But there’s always that one semester where we have to fill up an extra spot on our registration with some random class and we decide to go for that art history class, thinking it’ll be an easy A. We’re bio majors right? If we can prove that ultraviolet rays cause mutations in microorganisms, a simple art/humanities course will be a breeze. Boy, were we wrong.
4. “Wait…what? I’m standing for 2.5 hours? How is this not child labor?”
I don’t know if it’s just my friends and I, but I remember the first day walking into the chemistry lab, thinking you’re not in for any surprises because you’ve taken multiple college lab courses already, until you realize that there is not one seat in the room. That’s when the most horrid feeling hits you and you grasp the painful realization that you’re going to be forced to stand for two and a half hours straight as you attempt to not burn yourself with the Bunsen burner. Needless to say, the closest bench is one’s best friend after a long day in the chem lab.
5. “No, I am not a nursing major. No, I do not wish to become a nursing major.”
If we don’t compare math majors with accounting majors, why do people insist on treating bio majors as if doctors/dentists/biology professors/biologists and nurses are the same profession? If I wanted to be a nurse, I’d be a nursing major. So please do not ask us why we didn’t go for nursing or that we should consider switching our majors over. P.S. not every biology major even wishes to enter the field of health professions, so just save your breathe and don’t bother trying to even argue about how we’re comparable.
6. “I just spent $400 on textbooks…for one course.”
It’s like all the publishers out there already expect us to be doctors and dentists for the wealthy in the Hamptons or something (any Royal Pains fans out here?), How is it that science and math textbooks are ridiculously more expensive than other any subject area? When I was taking my gen eds, a typical textbook for a humanities course retailed for about $150, yet while taking any type of natural science, you can’t even seem to find your textbooks for under $200-300 on Amazon or Chegg. On top of that, we need separate textbooks for our wonderful lab courses, which generally are school-specific and must be purchased at retail price. Talk about inequality.
7. “Wake me up when finals week ends.”
There is not one collegiate that looks forward to finals week approaching, unless you have a trip to the Caribbean planned afterwards. However, why is it that while everyone else has their final exams and papers, we’re stuck with final exams, lab practical exams, oral reports, lab reports, and papers? And if we don’t ace all of it, there’s no chance of getting into med school. Yep, the struggle is so real.
8. “My name’s ___. I’ve been in your class for two semesters now…”
Anybody who’s been in a science lecture class knows that those will probably be some of the least interactive classes that you’ll take in college and that unless you somehow make yourself stand out, these professors are the least likely to remember your name due to the high volume of students in the class. No matter how frustrating it may be to introduce yourself to the same person about fifty times without them even showing a sign of recognition, hold your head up high and smile because you won’t want to be the formerly forgotten kid who threw that hissy fit.
9. “Being a bio major’s a piece of cake. Anyone can do it.”
Said no bio major, ever.
The morale of this article? Us bio collegiates are some tough chicks. Sure, our daily lives are a constant struggle, but it’ll be totally worth it once one of us finds the cure to cancer one day. Therefore, hold your friends close (it’ll be totally worth it when you need a free dental checkup in the future) and have fun because if anyone deserves a midnight run to Häagen-Dazs, it’s us. It takes someone special to be a bio major (not saying that any of you other ladies aren’t special, of course). #BioNerdPride