The race for the oval office is well on its way, with candidates Bernie Sanders and Donald Trump emerging victorious in the first primary election held in New Hampshire this past Tuesday. Whether you’re following the election or not, it’s clear to see that some of the candidates are the obvious superstars of the election. So to help you figure out who’s hot and who’s not this race, we’ve given each candidate a musical alter ego that you’ll recognize.
If you feel the Bern, chances are you understand why this candidate deserves Bey as his musical counterpart. Beyoncé is insanely popular, worked hard for her fame, and is very socially aware. Much like Sanders tackling issues of race and sexism in the democratic debates, Bey addresses racial and gender strife in her lyrics, music videos, and live performances. Her latest address, the music video and Super Bowl performance of her new song “Formation,” deals with issues of African American representation in the media. Sanders is perhaps the loudest candidate when it comes to speaking on minority issues, particularly those about the wage gap and incarceration records. Most recently, Sanders became the first candidate to speak about Sandra Bland, a black woman who died suspiciously while in police custody, and whose case was swept under the rug by the media.
On top of the serious issues, both Sanders and Beyoncé are known for not letting the haters get to them. Beyoncé hires back at criticism with songs like “Flawless,” and Sanders says he’s happy to have come so far from where he started. Both of these stars are powerful figures in their fields that hold a lot of influence over young people like us. They know their audiences and understand what’s important to them, and they communicate those interests in ways that attract our attention.
Hillary Clinton-Taylor Swift
At first glance, it seems awesome that we’d compare Clinton to TSwift. Swift is a self-made woman that actively speaks out for female empowerment and the importance of feminism in the media. That being said, it needs to be noted that Swift’s brand of feminism is very specific. She’s all about defending a positive body image and loving yourself, but when it comes to serious issues, she falls a bit flat. Hillary Clinton claims to be a proponent of change for women, but she really only discusses the issues that pertain to her. She frequently cites the statistic that women only earn 77 cents to a man’s dollar, but fails to realize that that statistic only pertains to white women, with the value decreasing lower and lower for women of color, dropping as low as 54 cents for Hispanic/Latina women in America. It’s awesome that Hillary and TSwift are so vocal about empowering girls and women, but when they fail to recognize the intersectional feminism that minority and LGBTQ women need in order to be properly represented, they lessen the value of all the good they’re doing too.
Republican candidates: Note* While there are several Republican candidates still in the running, we’re going to focus on the two most popular runners at the moment.
Ted Cruz- U2
Ted Cruz understands that he’s not anyone’s first choice for the presidency, so he tries really hard to make you remember who he is. And with over 13 hours of raw promotional footage on his youtube channel, partnered with his Buzzfeed audition video for the Simpsons, he’s made it really hard to forget his name. For those of you that don’t know, U2 is a band from the 80’s that your parents probably love. For a long time, they were an incredibly popular band, even being inducted into the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame in 2005. Despite their popularity, the band hit a dry spell in the 2010s. In an effort to make their 2014 album Songs of Innocence a hit, U2 teamed up with Apple to automatically download the album onto every iTunes account for free. Remember them now? How could you forget those 11 songs that you didn’t buy and didn’t ask for just suddenly appearing in your music library? The album was such a flop, and so many people uninstalled it from their accounts, that the band publically apologized to Apple users everywhere. Ted Cruz and U2 are both just trying to get the attention of younger audiences, and eventually get those audiences to like them, but they’re both failing miserably.
Donald Trump- Nickelback
Alright, we went there. Nickelback is that band you may have liked in middle school, but now you see them for what they truly are. True, you may still know all the lyrics to “Rockstar,” and for a while you thought the “Look at this graph” meme was pretty funny, but that doesn’t mean you would call yourself a fan. Back in the day, Trump was just a guy you occasionally saw fire someone on national television, and you didn’t think much beyond that. But now, Trump’s racist, sexist, and classist (a triple threat) remarks regarding his plans for presidency make us realize just how horrible he actually is. Nickelback used to be tolerable, but now, we almost instantly change the station when they come on the radio. Plus, both Trump and Chad Kroeger’s hair has been haunting our nightmares since the first time we ever saw them.
Whether you found our comparisons to be accurate or not, it’s important for you to pay attention to what’s going on in our country and all over the world. This election will have a huge impact on both domestic and international affairs, so make sure you get registered and get to voting. Whether you want to support Sanders, Trump, or one of the more moderate candidates in between, your voice means nothing if you don’t make it heard. Check your state’s primary dates and your district’s polling centers and cast your vote for your favorite artist’s political dopplegänger.