9 Questions Gay People Are Sick of Answering

You know when you go home for the holidays and face an onslaught of overly personal questions about your love life from nosy relatives? Our personal favorite is, “Do you have a boyfriend yet?” Well, imagine that multiplied times 10, and you have a day in the life of your average LGBTQ+ collegiette. Something about an “alternative” sexuality or gender identity brings out a million annoying (but sometimes well-intentioned) personal questions. Here are just nine of the most exasperating ones that we are just so over:

1. “When did you choose to be gay?”

Iced coffee or hot coffee, Chipotle or Five Guys, Scandal or House of Cards. These are all choices you make in life. While there are many decisions to be made, sexuality isn’t one of them. So the next time someone asks that pesky question, calmly explain to him or her that getting extra guac is a choice. Deciding whom you’re attracted to? Yeah, not so much.

2. “If I’m seen with you, will people think I’m gay?”

Repeat after us: Being associated with someone or something doesn’t make you the same as them. Being seen with your lesbian friend doesn’t make you a lesbian; it makes you a proud friend. So be yourself, and hey, if you do get asked the lesbian question, feel flattered!

3. “How do you know you’re gay if you’ve never been with a man?”

There are some things you just know are right. You just know when you’re in love, like you know the sky is blue. No one should question it, because you know it’s right for you. Being gay is like that. Just like straight people know whom they’re attracted to, gay people have the same subconscious attraction. So quit asking us!

4. “Don’t you think it’s unfair to raise a child with two moms/dads?”

Unfair to raise a child in a loving and caring, judgment-free environment? Sorry, we don’t get the question.

5. “You’re in college; don’t you think this is just a phase?”

Things that are phases: Loving Harry Styles. Wearing black lipstick. Binge-watching Friends on Netflix. What won’t change in seven years is the gender you’re attracted to.

6. “Why do you get to have a gay pride parade? I want straight pride!”


Being straight has always been accepted, so why celebrate it? That’s like throwing a parade every year in every major city for people who wear Uggs. Everyone has a pair, why throw a party? Finally being able to be yourself and accepted deserves a parade, a monument and anything else to show this country’s support of it.

7. “So when you go on a date, which person pays?”

Most girls across the nation, queer or not, would probably agree on one thing: We have no need for the old fashioned guy-picking-up-the-tab era anymore. Same-sex or opposite-sex couple, it’s just two people going to dinner and whoever gets the bill first is the winner (and their wallet is the loser).

8. “So who is the guy/girl in the relationship?”

Just like asking who pays for dinner, this question just comes from pure ignorance. There is no guy in the relationship—that’s the whole point.

9. “Why do you have to be so gay?”

There really is no way to address this annoying question. Being “too gay” or “too butch” is nonexistent. Be yourself and FCKH8!

Tagged: