I have a friend who I’ve been close with for years, but we are really different. I find when it comes to my sexual life she can be really judgmental. Is there anyway I can handle telling her things without her judging me? What can I say to gently bring to her attention that sometimes I just want to share my life, not be lectured?
It’s rare for two people to think or to see things in exactly the same way — even if they’re very close friends. Once you share information with a friend, you are opening the door for discussion and comment.
Because you haven’t given any specifics of what was said, I’m not sure whether your friend is judgmental (implying that she is critical of your sexual life); whether she’s uncomfortable openly discussing sexuality, in general; or whether she’s simply expressing her own opinions — which are different than yours — and that’s what’s making you feel uncomfortable.
If you don’t feel understood, feel misunderstood, or feel like you are polar opposites when it comes to your thoughts about sexuality, this may be a topic you agree not to talk about, focusing instead on topics that are easier and more satisfying to discuss.