The 7 Dumbest—Yet Sweetest—Things Schmidt Said to Cece on 'New Girl'

Quarantine has probably led you to explore new shows, and if you’re searching for a feel-good, heartwarming comedy, look no further than New Girl. It’s binge-able, adorable, and will make you smile every episode. 

One of the “will they? won’t they?” couples of the show, self-proclaimed douchebag Schmidt (who puts his foot in his mouth so many times his roommates created a "Douche Jar" akin to a swear jar) and model Cece, have a rollercoaster ride of a relationship, set back mostly by Schmidt’s ignorance. But, though he is flawed, Schmidt is undoubtedly lovable nonetheless, and he and Cece share some pretty hilarious moments throughout the show.  

Below are seven of the things Schmidt probably should have—though I'm glad he didn’t—kept to himself, but keep in mind if you haven't seen the show yet, there are some spoilers. 

  1. 1. Season1, Episode 1: Schmidt meets Cece 

    On meeting Cece for the first time, in cringe-worthy fashion, Schmidt asks if it’s warm in the apartment, takes his shirt off, and asks Cece if he can, “hit her up with some tea.” A hysterical start to their later completely adorable relationship.

  2. 2. Season 1, Episode 5: Schmidt describes what he loves about India

    Cece decides to give little Schmidt the challenge of guessing her ethnicity. After discovering she is Indian, Schmidt lists all the reasons he loves India. It’s pretty awful, but his ignorance makes for a laugh-out-loud funny monologue. 

  3. 3. Season 1 Episode 14, Schmidt’s cheese dirty talk 

    After spending yet another night with Schmidt, Cece is attempting to sneak out of the apartment unseen and tells Schmidt that it was the last time it was going to happen. Schmidt then prompts her to stay by saying, “they haven’t even gotten to the cheese course.” His explanation is as interestingly sexy as it gets.  

  4. 4. Season 1, Episode 19: Schmidt reveals he and Cece are an item 

    Jess, unfortunately, catches Schmidt at Cece's apartment one morning and blows their cover. The pair decide to tell the whole apartment the truth, and this was Schmidt's explanation: “Jess, I am so sorry that you had to hear about this like this. But can we just take a minute to celebrate me? Schmidtty really did it this time. I mean, I’m having Indian every night.” 

  5. 5. Season 2, Episode 16: Schmidt follows Cece to her dating convention

    Cece attends an East Indian dating convention in hopes she’ll find a husband, but she's placed at the dreaded Table 34 for being a model. Schmidt decides to speak up and tell attendees what they’re missing out on (in dumb, Schmidt fashion). But, what followed was a sincerity between the pair, with Schmidt recognizing he messed up an amazing relationship.   

  6. 6. Season 4, Episode 7: Schmidt says goodbye to Cece’s boobs 

    Cece decides to get a breast reduction, and Schmidt barges into the consultation to say goodbye–to her boobs, not Cece. In his words, “I have to look them in the eyes. I have to let them know how much they’ve meant to me.” 

  7. 7. Season 4, Episode 22: Schmidt proposes to Cece

    Cece, pre-proposal, asks him to please, please not say something stupid, but in the most Schmidt way possible, referencing one of the first moments the pair spoke when Schmidt told Cece, "Girl, I'ma marry you," he really hits the nail on the head. Check out the episode to see how it happens. You'll be crying, I'm certain.  

Schmece forever.