There is no day sweeter than days like today. Because today we were introduced to the fresh crop of ladies who will attempt to sweep charmingly handsome Ben H. (Ben Higgins? Bachelor Ben? Just Ben? Hmm…we’ll decide on his official title later!) off his feet when The Bachelor premieres January 4.
And while we were surprised to find that our names were somehow left off the list, we couldn’t help but cackle over the absurd professions these gals are repping. So first, stare at this drool-worthy Ben pic for whatever amount of time you deem appropriate. Then, feel free to sort through our rankings of the best professions. Who knows—you could find a major totally worth switching to!
5. Gerontologist
This one is funny mostly because of the way it sounds when we say it out loud. It’s also funny because it’s classified as the study of aging, something none of these women ever plan to do.
4. Cowgirl
We’re all about Southern charm, but what exactly does a cowgirl do? It’s not something similar to what Scott Eastwood’s character repeatedly risked his life to do in The Longest Ride, right? We’re guessing it’s more like “this young woman works on a farm, but we didn’t have the guts to call her a farmer.”
3. Twin
Unsurprisingly, there are two of these “twins” among the ladies vying for Ben’s heart. Not only is the creep factor off the charts, but we assume these women have or had in the past some type of actual professions that could have been listed instead.
2. Unemployed
Never in the history of ever has a Bachelor contestant been brave enough to simply call herself “unemployed.” Rachel from Little Rock—we cannot wait to make your acquaintance.
1. Chicken enthusiast
We see you, Tiara. You’re pretty much Kelsey, Ashley I. and Ashley S. all rolled up into one person, aren’t you? This profession could totally go one of two ways: she loves living chickens or she refuses to eat anything other than chicken nuggets.
For now, we’re left to hold out for those stylin’ blue backdrop portraits that ABC has yet to release. See you in January, ladies!