Growing up, I was an only child. The only person I had closest to my age was my cousin, who was a year younger than me. You can imagine how close we were. From playing mermaids in the pool, countless sleepovers, and many, many “vlogs” that we filmed and never uploaded, we were (and still are) the best of friends.
About a year ago, my cousin, opened up to me about him being transgender.
When I thought back to our childhood, Carter was never a typical “girl.” Most could say he was just a “tomboy” because he gravitated towards anything that a typical “boy” would gravitate towards. He tried to wear male clothing any chance he could, was always the male character in videogames, and never cared about anything traditionally feminine.
I asked Carter if I could interview him and share his story and his response was exactly what I thought it would be: “I don’t care.”
Carter, 20, started his official transition around January of 2021 when he started testosterone, a sex hormone drug that will help stop his biological female growth (such as the growth of breasts) and give him more masculine features, such as facial hair and a deeper voice.
Here are some of the questions I asked Carter to elaborate on (these answers are summarized from our conversation):
Me: When did you have a feeling you were transgender?
Carter: When I was 7. I had a dream that I was using the bathroom, but standing up like a boy would.
Me: What made you decide to fully come out as transgender?
Carter: I had a boyfriend (at the time), so I thought that he would care. So I asked him, “Would you care if I didn’t have boobs?” He said he wouldn’t care because he didn’t like Carter because of his (her) body.
Me: Are you going to do any physical body surgery?
Carter: Ya, yeet the teets. (I laughed out loud when he texted me this.)
Carter told me that initially, he was worried about what people would think, especially love interests. Carter dated and was attracted to boys, so he wasn’t sure what they would think if he himself was also a boy. He first cut his hair short in high school, but later grew it out to shoulder length. He made a fake TikTok account under a different name to see if anyone would care if he changed his name. He also started opening up and asking close friends if they would care. Everyone said that they did not care how he identified, because his identity was not a friendship barrier.
He did not tell me officially until a few months after—I joke with him that I was one of the last people to know. Once Carter told me, I immediately changed his name on my phone to “Carter” and started using that name instead of his old name.
Once Carter realized that nobody questioned him about his identity, he slowly started making his transition.
Carter officially and legally changed his name in August and celebrated with a Name-Change party which was titled, “It’s a Boy” on social media—a pretty funny title. After this, Carter has officially changed his identification such as birth certificate and license to read “Carter Peed, male.”
Carter’s biggest concern while figuring out this journey of his was the perception of others. He has grown so much and in typical Carter fashion, he “does not care” about what others think, and I am proud of him for that.
I am Carter’s biggest hypeman and am excited to follow alongside him in this journey with his transition.
The biggest takeaway from this is to not let the perception of others stop you from your true self. The longest person you will ever have to live with is yourself. Be who you want and live how you want. We have one life, and I am happy that Carter gets to live as himself.
Lot’s of Love,
Jess <3